Tag: train wife

  • When to End a Spanking

    One of the most common questions about giving a spanking is when to end it. Even men who are experienced in giving a spanking often simply make a judgment call. Those who are new beginners have less of an idea, and will benefit from sound advice. They naturally do not want to give one which…

  • Description of a Discipline with Resistance

    One thing you must know is that at times you will give spankings for things which are a judgment call. What amounts to bad attitude, or disrespect is not always so clearly defined, so men will be the ones to clarify the matter, and punish when necessary. I don’t worry too much about judgment call…

  • Can the Unbeliever Learn about Discipline from the Christian?

    I know there are some people who feel radically uncomfortable about going on a Christian spanking site, because they don’t agree with some Christian beliefs, or find them very odd. They still read articles. They continue to come. However, there can be a disconnect on certain subjects. A few may reject learning from these sites…

  • Problems You Have without Discipline

    Casual readers who hear about wife spanking are often quick to jump on potential problems with it. Even if they are generally accepting, they seem sure that someone’s going to do something wrong, and the practice is fraught with physical or emotional peril. This is a great exaggeration of course. But it also stems from…

  • What is Spank Your Wife?

    I’ve been surprised and very gracious at the number of visitors I’ve had at Spank Your Wife, including those who sincerely want to learn, and improve their marriages. I’ve also been greatly blessed to correspond at length with some of you. For first-time visitors though, it still may be unclear the overall purpose of the…

  • Managing Your Wife: Eating and Health

    This is Part 3 in the Managing Your Wife series, which has dealt previously with emotional outbursts, and finances. It is almost a stereotype that after a couple has been married for some years, the wife balloons up in size, and makes herself quite unattractive to him, and quite unhealthy. You don’t have to look…

  • She Did a Very Very Bad Bad Thing

    Is there a special way to deal with the worst of infractions? How should a husband respond to a wife’s truly terrible behavior? It makes couples wonder, even if they both hope they never need to face such a situation, or are confident that they never will. Does a husband need to reinvent punishment? Does…

  • Attitude: An Offense Without a Rule

    Most spankings in marital discipline are for clear offenses, or at times for training, if training is necessary. Perhaps the clearest are for direct disobedience, or for breaking a household rule. There are, however, some bad behaviors that really can’t be qualified clearly, but need correction anyway. One of the most common is simply having…

  • Why Men Like to Spank

    I’ve written before on reasons women love getting spanked, and I’d like to similarly discuss why men like spanking their wives. I felt more compelled to write the first article, because to many people it’s counterintuitive that women love to be spanked, and it’s assumed they would never want their husbands to tell them what…

  • Punished on Her Back

    The average use punishment seems to include positions which face a wife down, and place her bottom up, making an easy presentation of it to her husband. She goes over his lap, or bends over. She is facing away, or downward. Only her back and the soft target of her bottom are before his eyes.…

  • Wives Letting Go

    Women go through a process of letting go when they learn to submit to their man, and be corrected. Taking that position of submission is harder for women who have been raised in modern western values, or who have been allowed by their parents to live selfish, egoistic lives. However, it can be challenging to…

  • Readers Poll: Spanking Effects and Instruments

    Ladies: How does being spanked affect your behavior? A) I am careful to behave in the coming days B) I am careful to behave will for the long term C) I feel at rest with my husband, and obey him easily D) I want to be close to my husband, emotionally and physically E) It…

  • Bad Behavior in Public

    Husbands who have been leading their wives for a while generally know well how to handle any bad behavior by her in the home. They have an array of weapons, from instruction, to warning, to immediate discipline if the moment warrants it. For many couples this has become routine, and much is known and expected.…

  • Reader’s Poll: Why Did you Start Spanking?

    Dear Readers, Please let us know why you began spanking in marriage, or why you wish to begin. Leave your replies in the comments. You can view most of the articles on this website organized loosely by topic at the About Page.

  • Taste of the Cane

    Let me introduce another guest article by Mark, who is writing today about use of the cane in discipline. As with other guest articles, I’ve asked him to write on subjects I do not have hands-on experience with. I have never used the cane for discipline and he has. By all accounts of spanked wives,…

  • YOU

    There is someone who has been inspiring and encouraging me about the state of marriages. That someone is my dear readers on this site. That’s you. I have been regularly pleased to hear positive changes coming to marriage, as well as men and women who become open-minded and even passionate about applying headship to their…

  • There’s That Maintenance Thing

    I regularly hear from readers, and likewise from married men and women about maintenance spanking, with opinions both for and against. I’ve put out an article uniquely on this topic before, and I want to address a few related points. Maintenance rubs a lot of people the wrong way, but is also a common practice,…

  • Traditional Marriage and Wife Spanking in India

    This is a testimony from one of our female Indian readers about upbringing and marriage in traditional Indian, and Hindu families. Her husband has also helped me a great deal in understanding how marriage and family works there. This experience does not reflect every family in India, where in certain places western values have taken…

  • A Beginner’s Guide

    I want to make things as easy as possible for visitors to this discipline guide to get the best help possible. We do have many visitors who are new to wife spanking, or who just are curious and want to learn, and I often wonder if it’s hard for them to find the articles which…

  • Spanking is Not a Lifestyle

    It is easy for the new married couple to take time to adapt to having discipline in their marriage. In fact, to apply it to your life, for a husband to lead and correct his wife, and for a wife to follow him fully and with her whole heart, takes understanding and is aided by…

  • Repeat Spankings

    The idea of a husband spanking his wife several times in short succession seems on the surface a bit extreme. Often our first thought is that one punishment only deserves one spanking, or that having two in a row could be dangerous. With those limited ideas it seems superficially radical to be giving a spanking…

  • A Wife and the New World of Spanking

    This is a personal testimony from one of our readers about getting her first spanking from her husband. I believe it provides a useful picture of how spanking can begin in marriage. I took the kids where they were going, and got a text from my husband that he was already home. I called and…

  • Does Spanking Interfere with our Laughter and Fun?

    Taking the shift from modern western values to traditional ones, which respect the spanking of wives, will require adjusting much in your lifestyle, your attitudes, and your language. There are things from the past which will carry over well. There are practices which will naturally have to end, or simply become more subdued. If your…

  • Poll: What’s the Most Common Infraction

    Welcome to another Reader’s Poll, ladies and gentlemen. This time the question for men is: What behavior do you need to spank your wife for most often? Women can answer: What do you do that gets you spanked the most? Feel free to explain, and add any insight you like. You can find most of…

  • Sex as Dominance

    For many couples the introduction to a man’s headship and a wife’s submission is not a religious belief, or even a website like this. Their discovery of spanking may not be from a “fetish site” or a popular film. Rather countless men and women realize the reality of the marital interplay of masculine and feminine…

  • What a Woman Should Affirm During Discipline

    I’ve written several times specifically on the need for a husband to lecture his wife, and the importance of her hearing his words of guidance and correction. The importance of verbal communication cannot be overstated. It should be clear and firm, and touch on the main points she needs to learn. On her part, while…

  • A Response to MGTOW Fears

    The phrase MGTOW (men going their own way) is quite the buzz word these days. Like a lot of buzzwords, it describes a real phenomenon, and then subsequently forms a real phenomenon, encouraging people by its simplicity and clear identity to define themselves this way, even if their beliefs, thoughts, and causes are a bit…

  • Making it Past Early Resistance

    I’ve made it no secret in this discipline guide that much of the motivation for marital discipline comes from the ladies themselves, who desire to be disciplined. It is no stretch to say that most who suggest the wife’s submission, or firm correction, are the wives themselves. Yet despite this encouraging fact, women will find…

  • That Tender Early Period

    As many couples are beginning their journey into marital discipline, they experience with some excitement, as well as trepidation, that early period of learning. For a wife that frequently means more spankings than usual, as she gets used to her husband’s rules and expectations. For a husband, it means some amount of experimentation, of deciding…

  • Is It Wrong if I Enjoy Spanking?

    Men and women involved in wife spanking sometimes get the idea that it’s wrong for them to enjoy spanking at all. If there were any level of enjoyment, it is no longer discipline, the logic suggests. They likewise might think that finding some satisfaction in this intimate act of chastisement means they are doing it…

  • Does Spanking Empower a Wife?

    Oh how are you empowered my darling, let me count the ways. Nearly the buzzword of the century for feminism is the word empowerment. We have a whole culture that is unafraid to brag that they care to empower one of the sexes uniquely. Empowerment gets instilled into the mind of young women as what…

  • When to Pause or End Spanking

    Perhaps one of the hardest decisions to make is deciding if spanking needs to be done away with. It’s a big marriage decision to start it, and just as big a decision to step back from. I obviously think spanking is excellent, and helpful for couples in most instances. However, spanking can also carry unique…

  • Spanking Poll: Who do you know who spanks?

    This is our fourth spanking poll for readers. Please join in. Men and women can both answer this question the same. Choose any answer that applies to you, and feel free to explain in the comments. What friends do you have who spank? A) I know some people online B) I met some people online…

  • Kneeling in Marriage

    Kneeling is used in many marriages with discipline to communicate what is close to the core of marriage. It is often used in correction as well, and to sexually train a wife. While westerners balk at kneeling before an authority, often for cultural reasons, kneeling has been a form of reverence for thousands of years,…

  • That Group Thing

    I have a healthy respect for the variety that exists in marital discipline. However, I want to warn about one aberrant practice that you find in some spanking homes. This is the use of onlookers during a spanking, or even of having others come in and perform the spanking. I make mention of this in…

  • Description of a Discipline for Bad Mouth

    My wife and I walked into our quiet apartment after our trip. Coming home from about a week away, we took time to put our bags down, and put away a few of the more important things. We talked on the couch a few minutes on our trip and about the coming  day. Then I…

  • How Spanking Cleanses a Woman

    Much can be said about spanking’s punitive abilities, or its deterrent effect. In fact, those are some of the first things we think of when we think of punishment of any kind, and one of the first things that comes to mind with spanking, along with its intimacy and nudity announcing it as profound marital…

  • How Spanking Makes Men Better Leaders

    We often hear about how spanking can build a woman’s submission, or better her in other ways. I write regularly about that topic myself. I believe we hear a little less about how spanking his wife helps a husband in his role. This element deserves more than passing mention, and is of great significance in…

  • Bad Habits Spanking Puts in the Past

    I could not begin to tell you all of the improvement I have heard from couples in how spanking changed a wife’s behavior. From small to major problems have been put solidly in the past. They might make an occasional reappearance, but their habit, and the mindset that it’s okay to do, have been taken…

  • Wives Teaching Wives

    I’ve only recently used these pages to invite singles to meet here for marriage with a like-minded partner. I want to use this article as a chance for newer wives to meet with more experienced ones. Discipline is a topic that many are private about, and tell few if any people they practice. For this…

  • The Use of Restraints

    The field of wife spanking comes with some common rituals that occur in the large majority of households. When it comes time for a punishment, it is typical for the wife to place herself over her husband’s lap (after undressing of course), or to bend herself over the bed, or a sofa. She remains in…

  • Humbling a Rebellious Woman

    Spanking functions well to correct a wife who slips out of her submission, or who chooses to do something harmful. It is a simple guide for her in accomplishing her goal. Spanking becomes more challenging, and discipline needs to be done more thoughtfully when training a rebellious woman to live in peace. Most of the…

  • The Swat Heard Round the World.

    One of the most interesting parts of running this discipline website is to see all the places it reaches across the world. As a man who wants discipline to benefit many more marriages, and to help couples in learning to practice it, I am greatly enthused that it gets a decent readership across the globe,…

  • No . . . Not the Cane!

    The cane has been an instrument of civic punishment for millennia, and similarly in schools nearly as long. We can see uses of a literal rod for punishment in ancient Greek and Roman schools, as well as in early China and India. Small, primitive tribes in Africa have been known to use various kinds of…

  • What Can a Man Do?

    I want to answer some of the common questions that men have when they are faced with the possibility of learning to discipline their wives. This might come up because their wives ask them for a spanking, or it might come up because he learned about spanking online and is considering its use. While many…

  • Use of the Warning

    The effects of spanking and the effects of your overall leadership as a husband go hand in hand. This is perhaps nowhere more clear than in finding that warnings do immediate good to change her behavior. They don’t involve having to spank her, but only letting her know she will be spanked if her misdeeds…

  • Consent in a Spanking Marriage

    The subject of consent comes up immediately for nearly anyone if the subject is disciplining wives. We understand intuitively from our sense of fairness that consent in some form must be given. A spanking is something that most people do not desire. In the moment, they may in fact absolutely not want to experience it.…

  • The Spanking Pastor

    You sometimes hear stories in the world of wife spanking about the spanking pastor. This is the one who actually teaches couples to use spanking in their marriage to discipline the wife, and who also possibly spanks his own dear wife. Like other stories, I am usually skeptical of the reality of the story. I…

  • DD Practices I Do Not Use [PART 2]

    Part 1 of this topic covers: Counting Strokes, Journaling, Pleasure Denial and Control, Back Door Training, and Safe Words The Cane: While it’s not the most common instrument, more than a few husbands discipline their wives with a cane. For some it is an instrument kept only for the worst of offenses. The rest of…

  • Keeping Her Bare

    Nearly anyone experienced in training a wife will tell you the great asset of keeping her bare. That means keeping her bare for training, not just for making love, or for a spanking. Being undressed is an excellent way for her to learn submission to you, and understand deeply how fully she belongs to you.…

  • The Verbal Correction

    I can never emphasize enough the importance of the husband guiding his wife with words. This goes for giving clear instructions, encouragement, and praise. It also includes providing some amount of correction verbally. He should know he has this tool to use when keeping the home in order. That’s why I recommend using formal verbal…

  • Ode to My Readers

    When I started this website and spanking manual, I did not expect a great number of readers. I thought it would get some attention since spanking is a spicy subject to many people, and because there are plenty of men and women seriously interested in marital discipline. However, I have been overjoyed to see the…

  • Readers Poll: When do you Spank

    I hope you enjoy this little poll about spanking. Men and women can both answer, and even if you do not currently spank in marriage or get spanked, you can still share your thoughts below. When do you spank your wife: Ladies, feel free to answer about when you get spanked.

  • Commands in Sexual Submission

    I can never stress enough how helpful intimacy is in heightening a husband’s leadership and a wife’s submission. It helps the partners to learn it better, and it helps a wife sustain and deepen her submission to her man. It even takes her through some of the release and the softening that a spanking over…

  • Mouth Soaping Instructions

    This is another guest article by Mark, a husband who leads his home and spanks his wife. Since the topic is a form of punishment I have never had to use — soaping out the mouth — it is best that another experienced husband write it. I hope you enjoy his perspective and advice. As…

  • Men Afraid to Give a Spanking that Hurts

    One of the difficulties many men face in beginning to discipline their wives is their own fear of giving a spanking that hurts. Just as they often have discomfort in stepping into a clear authority role, they also have discomfort with the idea of “hurting” their wives, even for their own good. IF this is…

  • Realizing Your Authority

    One of the difficulties men have in taking on headship over their wives, and also in disciplining them, is in realizing the true authority they have. This may also be a challenge for men who understand they have headship, and believe in it intellectually or spiritually, but have seen headship softened to the extent they…

  • Helping a Wife See Her Responsibility

    Part of your work as a leader in applying discipline is to help your wife see her responsibility for her wrongs. When she knows her responsibility, and ceases making excuses, is when she will benefit most from your correction, be it a verbal, or spanking correction. You need to communicate not just what she did…

  • Spanking Polls for Readers

    Here is a poll for men and for women. Since I can’t get the polls at WordPress to work, I’ve just written them out, and you can answer them in the comments below if you wish. Feel free to explain. For women:What do you think of spanking? A) I kind of like the idea, but…

  • Discipline Turns Around a Marriage

    This is a guest article by Mark, who brought spanking into his marriage after it had started, and during a time of difficulty. Since having difficulty, and introducing discipline some time into a marriage, are both common situations, this is a topic I thought would greatly benefit the readers here, and anyone else who might…

  • The Hairbrush

    The hairbrush is among the least conspicuous instruments in wife spanking, and many wives who are spanked this way look askance at the sight of the brush lying out in their room. They hope that it’s presence does not signify anything to come. It may or it may not. If it’s not in front of…

  • Description of a Paddle Discipline

    This article describing a paddle discipline I’ve given could easily be called a description of a serious, or a harsh discipline. That’s because in our home I keep the paddle for the more serious kinds of punishments, for the worse offenses. In other homes, the paddle might be the normal mode of punishment, but I…

  • Experiencing Real Remorse

    It’s not always easy to feel truly remorseful for a wrong. Sometimes we still wish privately we had gotten away with it, or we simply want to get a punishment over and done with. There is no deep connection with our soul or deep change. Our heart is still semi-hard. Yet that is what every…

  • High Gear and Intensive Training

    Much of what a husband does in leading his beloved wife amounts to training her. He shapes her to have a right attitude, leads her growth in virtue. Corrects her with gentle words, and with punishments. He aims to make her blossom as a submissive wife and woman of God. As one of the men…

  • Tenderbutts and Domestic Discipline

    There is a phenomenon in domestic discipline I’ve wanted to write about for a long time now. I call that phenomenon: the Tenderbutts. If you haven’t met them yet you will. No, it’s not wives with very sensitive bottoms. It’s not even people who love a more sensitive brand of wife spanking. It is those…

  • The Enforcer: Keeping an Instrument of Fear

    Marital discipline is meant to keep a wife in line, and a spanking should be undesirable, and a thing to be feared. Often this is the case. Other times a woman does not want to get the message, and the attraction of disobedience, or personal pleasure convince her to do wrong is worth it, and…

  • Discipline Practices I Do NOT Use, and Ones I Discourage

    Husbands who have been leading in discipline for even a short while learn that you are making decisions from early on in building your discipline system, and in how you spank. You learn from trial and error, from imagination, from hearing from other couples and their unique practices. Over time you develop your accepted standards,…

  • Why I Chose Spanking for my Marriage

    I decided to use spanking as a discipline tool in my marriage for a variety of reasons. It was always my plan, and it was a practice I told my wife about before we were married, and while we were still discussing elements of a possible coming union. I was comfortable, and confident in talking…

  • Spanking is Bad, M’Kay (Part 1 of 2)

    Most people who practice wife spanking aren’t overly swayed by the opinions of the culture. Otherwise, they wouldn’t be doing it in the first place. However, the opinions of the culture do demand the practice is usually private, and often the culture demonizes those who discipline their wives. For that reason, I want to take…

  • What Makes an Effective Spanking

    If you are leading your home in discipline, or if you are the one receiving discipline, it is natural to ask if spankings are accomplishing what they’re meant to accomplish. The husband is giving them for a desired purpose. How do you know if a spanking is effective? You might ask that about an individual…

  • Leading Her with Words

    I emphasize throughout this manual that spanking your wife is only a tool in leading her. It is not what leading is all about. To make spanking the main way of guiding your wife would be imbalanced and leave her wanting. The daily, regular way of leading, and correcting is with words. Words reach her…

  • Calling Him Sir

    Having a wife speak to her husband with a term of honor during discipline is nearly universal in wife spanking. I will have my wife use “sir,” but you will find it is a personalized choice, and other husbands have their wives use other terms. The use of honorific language, terms that clearly state his…

  • When She Wants to Get Punished

    A phenomenon many men are familiar with is the wife that does something just so she can get into trouble and be spanked. Usually, it’s something minor, but enough to get her husband’s attention and some time over his knee. This is usually referred to in domestic discipline as bratting, but just think of it…

  • Description of Discipline for Arguing

    It is not common that my wife is argumentative with me, and occasionally if she starts, I can let her know she should not continue, and she listens carefully. Rarely, I have to punish her her for arguing. Her recent discipline happened because she persisted in arguing with me in front of the children, over…

  • Is Spanking Only for Surly Women?

    It’s keen to notice that even those who are accepting of wife spanking tend to think it’s useful only for surly women, or for those who otherwise love it. A man considering spanking for his marriage may think the same way — if she’s got bad attitude I will use it, if not, forget it.…

  • Sex in Submission (Part 2 of 2)

    This article contains explicit content. If you find that inappropriate you may not want to read it: Serving Him: One of the simplest and well known ways to help a woman grow in submission and in yielding to her man is to have her regularly give oral sex. She should be comfortable kneeling before him,…

  • Sex in Submission (Part 1 of 2)

    The following contains explicit content. If you find that offensive you may want to skip it: You sometimes find people scratching their heads as to why spanking is such a sexual act, or trying to figure out why men love to smack some butt when they are making love to their wives. Where does this…

  • Starting Discipline in the Home

    Once you have decided to correct your wife with spanking, your next step is to put this into practice in the home. Some of this may amount to establishing clear leadership and rules in the home, if you have not done that already. For others, it my simply amount to starting to enforce the rules…