Resistance During a Spanking

Talk to nearly anyone in domestic discipline, from the newer to most experienced, and they will tell you they sometimes have to deal with resistance while they are giving a spanking. It is not easy to receive the pain of swats on the bottom, or deal with the fear of the punishment, especially if trust is not very deep. While resistance is fairly common, you can deal with it easily the large majority of the time. You need to make sure to be firm, and not give in to any resistance from your wife during her correction.

Perhaps the most common form of resistance is for a woman to reach her hand back where you are swatting, and try to protect her bottom. This is almost an automatic reaction to pain for some, so it can take time to overcome, to learn to accept the painful spanking without resistance. Even women who are truly committed to their submission will give in to the temptation to reach back and protect their bare bottom. In my own case, I deal with this very rarely. On the occasion my wife has done it, I tell her to reach her hands forward and keep them there. That is all I need to do. For husbands who find it is a real problem, they often warn her that reaching back is another infraction, and will add more swats to her punishment. Some may make the sensitive upper thigh the landing point of a few hard swats to punish her for any resistance. Others will have her come back for a second spanking after the first, if she does not comply quickly.

One thing that she has to know, clearly by your words and behavior, is that she may not get out of her correction. If she tries, you will bring her back, and if needed continue longer. She is under your command, and has to learn to accept the rightful discipline she has earned. It can take some learning for her to do this, especially if she is new to the experience, or if the spanking is especially hard. Accepting her spanking is a part of her submission to you. Resistance will never get her anywhere. If you feel it is necessary, you can also restrain her more forcefully than usual. That can help her as well in knowing not to resist, since she knows she cannot anyway.

I have dealt in many years with two occasions in which my wife jumped up during a particularly hard spanking. Either because of the pain itself, or some amount of negative feeling, she did what is surprising in our home and removed herself from my lap. In one instance, she jumped up holding her bottom and ran a few steps, saying she could not take it. My reply to that was to be patient, let her calm down, and explain a few things to her.

I told her one, that I am her husband and I love her and am committed to her every day. I also explained that I am responsible for her, and she is in good hands with me. My hands are going to correct her for her wrong, because her wrong was disrespectful to me and harmful. She needs to accept that and receive her correction. I spoke to her calmly and firmly, and spoke repeatedly about how things have to work. My devotion to her and my firm punishment of her behavior go hand in hand. I reminded her she was the one who put herself here by her behavior, behavior I’d warned her about before, and she would have to accept my correction. When she was calmed, I tapped on my knee several times, she placed herself back in position, and I finished her strapping. That could have been a failure, but it was a success because I did not back down to her resistance. I am her husband and I am in charge.

In a similar instance, she jumped off of my lap during a more difficult portion of a punishment. While I had a similar talk with her as I’ve just described, it was already late, and she took time calming down, so I was prepared to let the rest wait until the next day. Amazingly we both were free during the day, and had private time. I told her we needed to go up to the room together and she joined me. We need to set this straight, I told her. We need to set things in order. She said, I know that. You do not reject your man’s discipline. You need to listen to me and obey. I know, she said, calmly. Okay, that’s good. Get yourself prepared to receive it. She undressed and knelt down to receive a short talk from me, and then placed herself over my lap and I gave her what she had coming.

Whether you deal with such strong resistance, or only with her squirming, you will need some strategies to respond. You also need to be firm and effective in your reply. Whether it is adding extra punishment, holding her firm, or having a long talk, you overcome her resistance every time. The same is true her excuses for bad behavior. It is not her place to interfere with a punishment. Over time, especially as she grows in submission and trust in you, she will show little resistance, except perhaps in the hardest of punishments.


15 responses to “Resistance During a Spanking”

  1. […] the simple fact you are disciplining her for an infraction, and she brought that upon herself. Like resistance during a punishment, it needs to be overcome. She is going through this because of her own actions. Her tears can be […]

  2. […] gotten up from her position two times because the heat got too hot. In both of these occasions she understood her error, and later returned to her punishment position to receive the strapping she deserved. Otherwise, […]

  3. […] My wife has learned excellent discipline, and self-control, as any woman can, and knows not to run from a spanking or seek to end it. She has gained much from her discipline, both in the short term and long term. […]

  4. nicolelinn45 Avatar

    As I have grown in submission and trusting my husband that he is the one looking at and checking my butt during spanking, paddle, strap…..I have come to learn that he never damages my butt,even though it feels like it. I trust that he will punish me effectively and to his satisfaction. I have noticed that since I totally trust him with my butt and the punishment it has freed my mind and heart to accept his discipline and to get back into that sweet submission and under his authority. It is so freeing to be able to do that during discipline.
    I do throw the hand back and kick my legs at times, usually this is at the beginning of a spanking. He will increase the swats or land a couple on my thighs while telling me to move my hands above my head and to keep my feet spread and touching the floor while keeping my butt high and in place. This is an act of submission as well when I obey him and concentrate on staying in place to accept his correction.
    I am a Christian wife still growing and learning and grateful to have a husband “man” enough to take me over his knee😁

    1. Nic, Thanks for your comment and for sharing your experience in submitting to a spanking. You are very blessed to have a husband like that. It is right that it takes a great deal of trust to be spanked, and this trust helps build a woman’s submission. The man is in charge and he is the one giving the correction, even when it gets hard. You show a great attitude. Keep growing.

  5. tholla521 Avatar

    Thank you for this, as it has helped me understand my husbands methods a bit more. I am going to try not to resist so much and break this habit. I realize he is not being what I thought was “mean” for no reason. I have been making his work harder on both of us!

    1. That’s great. I’m glad you’ve benefited from the article. Your response shows a humble, and submissive heart, and a real understanding of discipline. Yes, it will make things much better for your husband as you learn to resist a spanking less. He has a good purpose in correcting you. Thanks for sharing your thoughts.

      1. tholla521 Avatar

        How often do you recommend discipline or spankings? Obviously for infractions of the set rules and agreements, but what about “maintenance” sparking’s? Are these a thing that are actually necessary? And if so how often? I only ask because I am new to this, and I have been very well behaved for several weeks! But my husband tells me that I am due for a “maintenance” session in the next few days. I am trying not to argue….but what gives?

        1. Hi, those are very good questions, and are common concerns. I let my wife’s behavior determine how often she is spanked. Early in our marriage that was every few weeks. These days she gets spanked every few months. It can vary. A spanking or punishment comes only when she needs it.

          The use of spanking for other purposes — I call them training spankings — are used in many, but not all households. What is often called “maintenance” is meant to help instill a deeper sense of submission, or to generally improve behavior, even if there has not been a specific infraction. Some husbands give maintenance every week, but the frequency can vary.

          I believe training spankings can be very helpful for a wife who is new to being submissive, and new to discipline. It can also be helpful if there have been repeated problems with discipline, in order to help keep a wife on track. I think they can be good for those two purposes, but I don’t recommend using them all the time. If you are facing a maintenance spanking, seek to learn what your husband desires you learn from it. I’m sure he has a reason for delivering it.

          I have a few articles on these subjects. One entitled What’s the Frequency deals with the frequency of spanking.

          One entitled Spanking as Training deals with maintenance.

          I hope that helps you. Take care!

  6. Very insightful. I love how you balance your love for your wife with the need to enact discipline within the household.
    I am interested as to how often you default to physical discipline after a single infraction. Or do you use other methods of discipline (I.e. verbal warnings, or not allowing her to buy new clothes etc), before a pattern of disobedience/mistakes emerge, then resorting go physical punishment?

    1. Hello David, That is a very good question. I will spank after a single infraction if it is serious, such as disobedience or dangerous behavior. With more minor infractions, I usually spank after giving a warning or repeated offenses. I also use verbal correction or non-spanking discipline for some minor wrongs.

  7. Just to add on to my previous comment… let’s say ones wife is using the internet too much and neglecting other duties. Do you immediately punish her, or do you talk to her first and give her several warnings before a spanking if she continues to make the same mistake?

    1. If I saw in the moment she was wasting time I would just give her a gentle reminder of her duties. However, once it entered the territory of negligence, or if I saw it was a repeated problem, I would spank. This is something that definitely comes up a fair amount, so I am used to making those judgment calls. For the more serious end of negligence, I will give a very hard spanking. It deserves it.

  8. I.SvenSSen Avatar

    Perfect article

    1. Thank you. I’m very glad you appreciated it.

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