Varying the Heat

Spankings need not be exactly the same severity each time. In fact it can be detrimental if they are. Just as it can be helpful to vary certain parts of the spanking — such as the location, or her state of undress — it’s helpful to vary the harshness of the spanking. That’s not just for the sake of variety, but for the sake of giving an appropriate punishment, and instilling the seriousness of certain offenses. Know that in leading your wife in discipline, you will be varying the heat.

The most obvious need to vary is to save the high heat for the worst behavior. There are some husbands who have a low heat setting, but I do not. As I mention elsewhere in this online manual, I do not give mild spankings. If you sincerely find they are useful, be my guest, but I believe a spanking should hurt, and should inspire some dread.

I will use a medium heat for what I consider average misbehavior, especially if it’s just a one-time thing. I use high heat for the serious or repeated problems. I also save an “epic” setting for the worst of offenses, the kind of sessions that do not happen often, but which are terrible and will not be forgotten. Almost everything falls under medium or high heat. That lets her know what behavior is especially harmful, and gives her  a lesson which fits her behavior. Along with my lecturing her, the severity provides a point.

As I sometimes tell her — this is hard to bear right now, but the results of your behavior would be much harder to bear, and affect all of us. The heat on her bottom is connected to her wrong. Varying the severity then works with my lecture and her learning together. Considering as her leader I want her to have an inner sense of the wrong, and of her responsibility, over time she will come to know what to expect with a coming punishment, as she has had to face her offense, and experienced punishments which are appropriate to it.

Some husbands who are new will take time to learn where the mild, medium, and high settings are. There will be those who tend toward being afraid of hurting her, and spank too softly, but there are also those who think they can apply all of their strength at once, and provide more pain than necessary. In this culture, which is rather soft, I think most spanking husbands will fall into the first category. That can lead a woman unfulfilled, not impress her with your authority, and not provide much of a reminder or deterrent into the future. Expect it to take time to learn how much strength and what spanking instrument will reach the desired level. Most of the time your wife’s reaction will help you know too, as will the color change in her bottom, but you also need to develop a sense of your own power and of the instruments. Give it some time.

Another area you can vary the heat, although less important than the first, is during the spanking itself. Some husbands prefer to start with light strokes, to accustom their wives to the punishment, and get their bottom warmed up so to speak. Then they raise severity later. I don’t do this much, but some men swear by it. The other possibility is if you have delivered a spanking of good severity, and appropriate heat, but you find you still have more points of your lecture to cover while she is over your knee. In this case, you may choose to slightly lessen the heat as you make your final points of the discipline session. The pain will still help you make those points, but it won’t be inappropriately high.

Whatever you give your wife, it is a lesson she will need to learn. Make sure it is fitting to the bad attitude or behavior you are correcting, as well as the possible ongoing nature of the offense. She is in your hands, and you are working with her, body and soul, for her good. You choose the heat to apply, and the color her bottom will be when you are finished. She will see the care and control you have over her, and of the discipline system. She will better learn her belonging and her submission to you.