Is Spanking Only for Surly Women?

It’s keen to notice that even those who are accepting of wife spanking tend to think it’s useful only for surly women, or for those who otherwise love it. A man considering spanking for his marriage may think the same way — if she’s got bad attitude I will use it, if not, forget it. Then he may dismiss spanking if he marries a gentler and less rebellious woman. We almost automatically imagine some brash lady who gives her husband lip, or who comes home hours late as the test case for a good whipping. This kind of thinking can lead to a misjudgment, and a bad decision, based on a narrow view of discipline. That’s because spanking is very useful in marriage, even for the more obedient wives. 

One reason it is helpful for more naturally submissive women is that they also get out of their place, even if they do it in less open and bold ways. As a husband and leader to a meek wife, one who is that way by her personality and upbringing, I can attest to that tendency. A woman who openly respects her husband, and does not raise her voice to him, can slip into ignoring his instructions anyway, or being argumentative, or uncooperative in a quieter manner. She may just ignore what he says. She may treat his words as something she can put off until convenient. She has the outward manner of respect and obedience, but sometimes slips into bad behavior anyway.

Spanking proves useful in these situations, and for wives of this character. Quietly slipping into independence and disobedience is just as wrong as open rebellion and disrespect. It may be less explosive and harmful in the moment, but in the long run it can lead to a breakdown, and it leads to the man being disobeyed. As I have told my wife several times when she is over my knee being corrected, you cannot simply tell me — yes, yes — to be submissive. Submissive means you hear my words and obey. It doesn’t matter how nicely you speak, you need to obey your husband. It’s a lesson she’s had to receive through punishment, and which I’ve also seen her learn from quickly. Her overall strength in being submissive has never meant she doesn’t need to learn some lessons, or does not benefit from discipline.

If you know enough couples, you will likely find there are gentle and sweet wives who are quite independent from their husbands. Ones who give their husband’s will little care, nor defer to their husbands regularly. How did that happen if they are so meek naturally? Well, much of the time, it happened because the husband was not clearly leading them, or disciplining them when they did wrong. Over time, they lacked his strength and spiritual leadership, and absorbed some pretty awful things, the first of which was that their husband did not need real respect and obedience. They might also have learned poor values and behavior from others, since their husband was not monitoring that.

Absorbing impurity is another arena in which a lack of discipline can affect the less rebellious kinds of women. For example, of all the gentler women you meet who happen to practice immodesty, lewdness, bad language, the occult, or who take male roles rather than female ones in church, you can be assured there has been little discipline from their husbands. They might not have started out with those practices, but their husbands either did not lead them or did not punish them for their wrongs to correct their behavior. So quietly, and without loud rebellion, they took on those and other terrible behaviors. Quieter women need the protection and guidance that spanking can provide just as surly ones do. Any woman can drift to the right or to the left of how a Christian wife should live, and the husband needs to set the guard rails.

I don’t want to make it sound like your wife is just a terrible person. I’m sure she is not, and is sincerely trying to live her faith. But she needs your leadership and protection in doing so. Anyone can be tempted by pride. Rebellion is not only marked by direct disobedience or insults to a husband. It is marked by passive disobedience, by not doing your job, and by drifting out of your rightful role and rightful work. All of these things gentle women can be tempted to do, even if they are well behaved most of the time. Do not underestimate the power of your hand on your wife’s bottom — it both punishes wrong, and more deeply reminds her of her place, safely and peacefully, under your authority. Spanking will help submissive women to be submissive, even those who already desire to do so.

I recommend that any husband keep spanking on the table as an option in marriage. That does not mean he has to use it, but he should know he can if he needs to. He might choose other forms of discipline also. He simply should not disregard spanking. In over fifteen years of marriage I have never regretted introducing it, which I did from the beginning. I have a godly and respectful wife, and it is my role to encourage her in that, and keep her that way. Her values were not always as strong as they are now. She has had other temptations working on her over the years, and influences from friends when she was younger. I am the strongest influence on her life, and I will continue to be for as long as we live. You can be confident that spanking helps a gentler woman improve.


18 responses to “Is Spanking Only for Surly Women?”

  1. […] that she may go the route of making excuses. Not always, but it happens sometimes. My wife is very devoted to me, and to her role, but she does not like to face a punishment, and will sometimes do the same thing. […]

  2. […] does this happen? It does not happen by accident. Granted, there are good traits that she learned as a child. She also has a sincere faith, although it was not nearly as mature […]

  3. […] time to overcome, to learn to accept the painful spanking without resistance. Even women who are truly committed to their submission will give in to the temptation to reach back and protect their bare bottom. In […]

  4. […] they are burdened sometimes by their assertiveness, or by their heavy responsibilities. Naturally gentle ladies love to be spanked as well, and will find they have an easier time submitting to their man on a […]

  5. How about punishment other than spanking. I know you’ve mentioned this in past but how about a fuller discussion of other ways.

    1. Thanks for the comment. I have an article on Non-Spanking Discipline which I actually link to in the final paragraph above. It makes up only a small portion of this website, but I’ll probably do another one about it in the future. A lot of women would fear having to write a ten-page research paper much more than a spanking.

  6. My wife and I have been married over 49 years. She has been subject to spankings for about 48 years from me, and she is still not too old to need a good strapping from time to time. All our children are married and raising their own families. My wife grew up in an extremely strict home, she and her sisters and her mother were no stranger to their dad’s strap. Discipline in her home was openly practiced. The boys were no longer subject to spankings at age 13 but for the girls being 13 and older meant they were punished with the same strap as their mother and in the same manner. I was attracted to my wife before we married by her deferential manner, I also observed this very submissive demeanor in her mother, even to me.

    I learned all this about her family before we married when her father had a long talk with me and told me that I had a duty to correct Jane when I was her husband. At the time I quietly rejected this advise but after a year of marriage I found that I needed to discipline Jane as her father said I would Apparently having grown up under strict discipline Jane could not deal with there being no consequences for her behavior.

    This bring us to Aron’s post which I think applies to a situation that occurred about 35 or so years ago. Jane always has a very submissive demeanor, not just to me but any head of household. She even calls me sir in front of other people and quickly obeys me when I asked her to do something. Over time I became as strict as her father, she has a dress code, is required to be in the tub every night at about 8:30 and tucked in bed at 9:00. She is held accountable for doing her chores, though of course, when our daughters lived at home, they had chores and she was held accountable to see they did these chores diligently. If one of our daughters was lax in her chores and Jane did not bring it to my attention both her and the errant daughter were punished together.

    The story starts when one day, I came home from work early and decided to get the mail on my way in. Looking over the mail I found a credit card statement in Jane’s name that had a large balance. I could not believe she could do such a thing. I allowed her a reasonable amount of discretionary spending. She would only be punished if she went over this amount by a significant value, I was furious. I became more furious after I confronted her, and she seemed less than completely remorseful. I think it is obvious how Aron’s post applies to this situation.

    Now a few years earlier, quite by accident in an embarrassing incident, we discovered that our pastor spanked his wife. So, I told Jane this was so serious we needed to go talk with our pastor. So, I called our pastor and told him we had an important thing we needed to talk to him about. He set up am appointment at the church office.
    By the time of the appointment Jane had become very remorseful and I am sure afraid of what was going to happen. The pastor asked her a bunch of questions, he said little to me at first. Then he turned to me and asked how long it will take to pay off this credit card bill making the largest payment we could afford. I told him I guessed about two years. Then he said, this is what he felt needed to happen given the extreme seriousness of this behavior.

    First, he said we needed to start with Jane getting a paddling in his office right now. After this he said we will talk about what comes next. I said OK. I told Jane to get her clothes off and get into the corner I pointed to. She started to cry and seemed to have difficulty undressing but a few stern words from the Pastor and she was soon naked and in the corner. The pastor called his wife at the parsonage and told her to fetch his paddle. When his wife walked in the office with the paddle and saw Jane naked and crying in the corner, she seemed both relieved and amused. That women has a bit of a wicked streak.

    The pastor had Jane bend over his desk, and he gave her about 30 with the paddle. When he was done, Jane was dancing up and down rubbing her behind and telling us that was sorry she would be good from now on. The pastor told her to shush up and get back in the corner

    Then he said this was his recommendation. The credit card bill would come in every month and Jane should be given a spanking every time it came in. He also said he would like her to report to his wife every Saturday who will give Jane chores to do at the church. This would involve mostly cleaning, no heavy work. He said if his wife told him that Jane had slacked, failed to obey his wife or was disrespectful to his wife, he would, if I agreed, paddle Jane. When Jane finished her chores at the church, she would attend a short counseling and Bible session with him. I agreed to all of this.

    So, for about two years or so , when the Credit card bill came in, Jane would tell our oldest daughter to make dinner, she would place the credit card bill on the kitchen table with my strap lying beside it. She would then take her clothes off and wait for me in the corner in the living room, the usual place. When I came home, she would get 100 with the strap and get put back in the corner , while the family ate dinner and up until her bath time, where she takes her bath and goes to bed without supper. As always no one was allowed to speak with her when she did her corner time and she was not allowed to speak to anyone unless spoken to. Perhaps needless to say, she never did this again.

  7. So harsh. 2,430 strokes for one mistake -plus additional punishments. Jesus Christ was all about forgiveness.

    1. There is no reply facility to your article on Discipline practices you do not use or encourage, Aron. I think figging should be included here. Do you agree? Has any wife on this site been figged? What do you think?

      1. Hello Jade, I believe you can reply to every article through the comments at the bottom. I will check. That’s a good idea to put figging on the list, as I do not use it. I may expand the article over time and use that idea. Thank you. It is likely that wives who visit the site have been figged since it’s not that uncommon. Perhaps we’ll get some comments on it.

      2. Long Time Practitioner Avatar
        Long Time Practitioner

        jadecavendish94528 both of my wives have had a form of figging with the use of suppositories during corner time. In the last round of punishments my wife has received she has had liniment applied to her anus as an added measure. It gets her attention quite well.

    2. The punishment was proportional to the offense. Jane’s behavior was dishonest and disobedient and she put the financial well being of the whole family in jeopardy. Every time the bill came in the whole family was punished by having less income to put in savings or buy things that were needed. Just punishing her once for an act of outrageous disobedience and persistent dishonesty committed over a very long period was not the lesson she needed. The punishment was not unduly harsh.

    3. auntiebeth Avatar

      i agree, This man is not a Christian but a self righteous sadist and if he loved his wife he would never wanted let alone required that her nudity be revealed in front of another man other than himself. I suspect this is a “kink” that the so called pastor also shared.

      1. I agree. It is not good and is not the norm in domestic discipline to let another individual be part of a spanking. It also comes off as harsh to the extreme.

    4. Also no supper after receiving 100 lashes with the strap, made to stand infront of the Family naked and red raw from a sadistic whipping like that?
      That’s too much.
      My HoH would never let our Pastor administer discipline on my behind ever. Our spankings are private, away from extended family and in laws. I don’t miss meals and get whipped with a strap instead. Sure, I’d get paddled once a week over a period of 6 or 8 weeks depending on the damage I left on our credit card, then again Im not naive. I don’t use more than is limited for the month under HoHs limit and it’s more than enough

  8. […] Any woman can stray. It is a part of the woman’s fallen nature. The best of women have a rebellious stripe, and the most virtuous can be clouded by emotion. Leading your wife will take your thought, strength, and regular attention. While it might seem overwhelming when you are new, I believe the three standards I’ve just discussed — language, dress, and time — provide a strong starting point for guiding her. They teach you to be a diligent leader. They are also a blessing to her, as she learns her footsteps in following you, and allows her soul to be soft to you. I naturally don’t recommend you use them exclusively, since rulership is broader than that. You will find other areas you need to guide her in practically and spiritually. Bold disobedience has to be punished as well. Yet these three will help you get into practice; they teach you the steps and the interaction you should have, and will certainly require you spank her when needed. Begin shaping your wife, guiding her soul, making her more virtuous. Your home will make the world a better place. […]

  9. […] not to because it’s a miserable one. I use it because bad behavior will always appear with a wife, and I find tanning my wife’s bottom quickly and effectively deals with it. I give it to her […]

  10. […] will offer a few ideas though. The first is that, while some women do naturally have a gentle character, and while any woman truly living her Christian faith will be meek towards her husband, I’ve […]

Leave a Reply