Oral Training for Your Wife

One of the greatest signs of a harmonious marriage, and a beautifully submitted wife is that they share their bodies freely with one another. A wife does not hold back herself physically, and a husband knows he can enjoy his wife when he desires. In contrast, one of the signs of a marriage with conflict, and with a rebellious stubborn wife, is that their bodies are separate, a woman refuses her husband’s advances, and he knows he cannot receive much in the way of love in the bedroom. That’s because a wife’s submission in the marriage bed is a good sign of her submission daily to her husband. Her closeness to him physically and sexually also intensifies their intimate union of souls.

That’s why using intimacy to enhance a woman’s submission is natural to marriage, and positive for it. Marriage is self-nourishing that way. The keys are within the marriage itself to help it fulfill God’s will, and to help man and wife move together in harmony, as a soul should with its body. Sex in that sense is a form of training for marriage as a whole. A man learns and expresses his leadership, a woman learns and expresses her submission, receives from her husband, follows his will. A husband should be aware of this form of nourishment in marriage, and can use it to aid his wife in learning her submission, and to train her in it to the point of mastery. His mastery of his wife, and her mastery of submission.

Giving her oral training is perhaps the simplest and fastest way to help her learn her position. It gives her certain times to focus on pleasing her man, and receiving his command. Pleasuring him sexually this way shapes her inside in a few important ways. It teaches her the submissive position, since she will often give oral on her knees, and have her man above her. This reminds her she is on her knees daily and her man rules her. It teaches her to be receptive to him, to his lead, and to his command, as when she pleasures him she needs to receive his desire in her mouth and be filled with him. That openness to her man will stay with her, as she learns to be receptive to his desire and his words. Oral training teaches her the role of service because it is focused on fulfilling his sexual desire, reflecting her mindset daily that is on serving him and helping him to meet his needs. Like any sexual submission, it teaches her vulnerability and softness to him, the softness of her body to his firmness and power. She experiences him as king. In oral training she learns her belonging to her husband as she kneels and serves him and does all she can to please him.

I recommend training your wife this way with regularity. I don’t tell anyone how often they need to do it, but it should be often enough that it is a normal position for her, and she has grown comfortable with it. Have her learn to respond to your command to get on her knees and your command to pleasure you. Get down on your knees and please your man — should be easy words for her to hear. Give her instructions while she goes down on you, so her mind is engaged in what you desire, and in what she is doing. Encourage her when she is doing a good job, and if there is something you want, tell her specifically how to use her lips, her tongue, or anything else. Communicate your possession of her body, and of her mouth. Let her know her mouth, lips, tongue, and throat all belong to you.

Pleasing you is an activity you want her to be able to put her whole body into, and to do with passion. You should make sure she is not only moving her lips, but is working with her tongue as well. Give her something to do with her hands, whether it is handling your balls or stroking your body. A lot of women are so focused on the mouth they will forget to work with their hands, so give her reminders of what you want. You can also have her move other parts of her body to your pleasure, so you can watch her move, and enjoy her body. She should be very thorough on her knees to pleasure your balls along with your member, and give much attention to them. Have her spend a good amount of time working on your balls before you send her back up on your cock again. Many women envision this as a less pleasant task, but as they learn to satisfy you this way, they learn to love it, and understand there is nothing they can hold back from you. They need to receive everything you give them, and follow your commands.

You can also teach her to passively receive you by taking control of the act. Hold her tight and take her face as you would take her during sex. She will feel your full possession of her, and her full vulnerability of you as you grasp her firmly and take her mouth, hard or gentle, fast or slow, as you desire. You guide her. You open her up. She is your tender body to enjoy. You can have her put her hands behind her back so she gives up all control, only having her mouth parted, filled up, and enjoyed by her man. You are shaping her. She is learning to bend to your will.

A wife can learn to be open more fully to you when you teach her to take your cock in her throat. The ability is not learned overnight, but it does not take long to learn to relax the throat, and take the end of your member inside of it. Her first practice could be in her regular position, learning to take you a little deeper each time, and relax the back of her throat for you. Eventually, she will be able to receive at least part of your  manhood in her throat, and give you the greatest pleasure this way.

Once she is able to receive you, you can take her deeply in varying positions, but a position with her neck bent back is ideal. One of the easiest is to have her lay on the end of the bed, with her head hanging backward over the edge. Her mouth and throat will be well aligned that way. Then you can straddle her face and take her throat. Taking her this way can also be done normally on the bed if she is on her back. Simply lay a pillow beneath her shoulders, so her head will lean back, and take her from above her head. It will be easier for the man to balance this way, and the lean on her neck won’t be as severe as over the edge of the bed. It is also easy for the man to enjoy her body and fondle her while he takes her throat. Another way is to lay on your back, and have your wife kneeling close to your head, facing your feet, going down on you. You will find she has nearly the same angle on the throat. If you want to take charge, you can wrap your arm around her waist, take her by the hair, and easily start having her deep.

Over time, your wife should increase in her ability to pleasure you well, and in her enthusiasm to please you. Don’t expect great growth overnight, as it takes time to learn new techniques, and to grow comfortable with giving oral on command. A new wife who only licked her husband’s member dutifully will be bringing him to heights of pleasure as they grow in their marriage. She will be learning how he loves to be touched. She will be learning his responses, in what signals he is excited, and what signals he is nearing a climax. She will put her heart into pleasuring him, and learn to love the time she spends on her knees, not just in what it does for him but what it does for her. She will take pleasure in pleasuring him, and knowing that she is able to satisfy her man.

What you are doing in training her this way, as with other forms of sexual training, is helping to break down any barriers between you. It wipes away any resistance. When a wife is able to respond immediately to you, she starts losing thoughts of autonomy, of being better, of being critical of you. She is learning simple obedience, and complete giving of herself. She is also learning your guidance over her and your concern for all she does, as you guide her and speak to her as she gives pleasure. She is not apart from you, but is under your command. A husband should find the ease in guiding his wife as he finds in moving his own hands. They are connected and there is no barrier. A wife experiences this union more deeply through sexual submission. Having her submit orally, regularly, will focus her in learning this. She is your woman. She serves you. She is vulnerable to you. She is watched over by you.

Naturally there are times a woman pleasures her man orally during making love. Some men have their wives pleasure them orally after they spank her. I speak here of using oral solely for training in submission and apart from other activities. It is time only for her to please you, and to do it when you desire it. You may send her on her knees when you have a minute alone together. You may do it before bed or in the morning. You do not even have to take the time to do it to climax, but just give her the chance to respond to you, submit sexually, and feel you in her mouth for awhile. That alone is good for a woman to feel. It is a surprise that awaits her at any time — the incredible closeness of feeling you intimately. She should be ready, and eager, to receive you knowing she is your desire.

It should be remembered that this free uniting in sex is something normal to many marriages, not just ones that involve discipline. Man and wife become one body in marriage, and one part of a body does not deny the other. They enjoy each other when they desire. It is natural to marriage also because the man is the head, and the woman will do his will, whether in the bedroom or anywhere else. It does not take a spanking in a relationship to know that a submissive woman, and a loving woman, wants to please her man and keep him satisfied. That desire to please him comes with being female and with being his wife. I may expand on its usefulness in this article, but I hardly invented this practice. I am merely making observations about it. A woman’s sexual submission helps her grow as a wife.

Most people considering a woman on her knees fellating her man think immediately of the pleasure the man is getting. Yet the woman on her knees is going through a great experience, and fulfilling herself as she moves her lips, and swallows her man’s member. A woman who is on her knees regularly before her man will deepen her submission. This is nearly guaranteed. She experiences her submission by pleasing him with her mouth, she deepens it, an expresses it to him in exquisite detail. She grows in her softness to him and longing for his strength. All the while she knows her lord more intimately, learning his smell, his taste, and his shape as he slides between her lips without end and fills her.

Like a spanking, there are results into the future. There is the peace and closeness that follow shortly after. Then there is also the ease at moving together with harmony that they have in a far-reaching way, and that does not stop. There is the closeness of hearts and understanding, the thoughtfulness of the other that they share. A man also will be at peace knowing no barrier separates him from his wife. She is his completely. No woman could compare. A woman who desires to pleasure her man, and who can keep him satisfied is to be admired and praised. She learns skills only for him, and is able to meet and exceed his desires. A good husband will express to her how amazing and how loved she is.

If the stubborn wife we hear about is rebellious and strays from the home, the godly wife in contrast is soft to her husband, and cares for the home. In the marriage bed, that often translates this way: the  stubborn wife is too prideful for intimacy with her husband and strays from their bed. The godly wife follows her husband’s will, and belongs to him in their bed. Don’t doubt the truth of that connection, and the countless marriages it describes. There is peace and beauty in marriage when we follow God’s will. Learning to love the other sexually, and not reject them, is a part of any good marriage. Husbands can grow the strength of their marriage in training their wives sexually, as they train them spiritually. Wives can have the closeness and belonging they yearn for in fulfilling her husband’s desire, and being soft to his command. This is not unique to marriages that involve discipline, but is good for ALL marriages, and is a part of the nature of the union itself. Don’t disregard the fruitfulness of sexual training. Use it thoughtfully and regularly to help your wife grow. She will know she is yours.


114 responses to “Oral Training for Your Wife”

  1. Thank you for another incredible article!

    Although I am dominant with my wife, I often have issues formulating my commands verbally, mainly in how to verbally formulate commands in neither a weak and meek way nor a cold and robotic way. Instead I want to command in a strong and dominant manner, but warm as well.

    For example, you write, “You may send her on her knees when you have a minute alone together. You may do it before bed or in the morning.”

    What exactly do you verbally tell her when you want your wife to orally pleasure you spontaneously like this?

    1. Thank you very much.

      Yes, I think verbal instructions of all kind are important, along with lecturing. I have several articles on the use of words, and will write more on that in the future. Commands, like instructions, will help her respond to you. There’s no need to yell like a drill sergeant, although there may be unique times you need to raise your voice. I believe in nearly all instances calm and firm is better.

      In terms of sexual commands, I would get close to her, perhaps put my hands on her waist, and tell her — Get down on your knees and take me in your mouth. Or something similar — Get down on your knees and please your man. She should know what to do.

      I recommend other simple sexual commands as well. She should learn to respond to them immediately, and love to hear them. You should continue to tell her what to do while she’s giving head, and that will help her to respond to you, and be soft to your lead. It can be deeply fulfilling to a woman to obey your commands.

      I hope that helps you. Feel free to ask any other questions.

      1. Thank you Aron, excellent and I will implement your recommendations immediately with her.

        Throughout our home we have hard tile floors.

        Do you recommend having her kneel on the bare floor or instead on a rug or pillow?

        1. Hello Cid, Thanks for your question. I hope putting this into practice helps for you. I believe it will. I have never found that wood floors are a problem for my wife, but I don’t think I’ve tried tile. If you find that it is too hard, you are free to use a pad for her to kneel on. Of course with rugs, there could be rug burn as well. Whatever you find is best.

  2. Thank you for sharing this post, Aronhusband! I have passed this on to my husband. He is greatly enjoying your blog and finds your guidance quite useful 🙂

    1. Thank you, Nora. I am really glad your husband is enjoying it. I hope he gets a lot out of this one.

  3. iamhissubmissive60 Avatar

    Thank you Aron I never knew their were so many ways to give a bj I appreciate the time and effort in sharing this article. I will try this and see if it will help in our situatation. Also it should speak volumes to him that I want to be soft to his lead.

    1. You’re welcome. I’m happy the article on this form of submission was helpful to you. There are many elements to the marital union, but the sexual element is very central and key. I sincerely believe it can help, and I hope that it does in your case. It is a profound expression of your softness and submission. Blessings.

  4. hamiltonman Avatar

    Brilliant post, aronhusband. As I’ve mentioned in other comments, having my wife lie on her back with her head over the edge is my preferred position. I love being able to watch her tiny throat bulge as I slide my cock down her gullet. And I can fondle her tits and even spank her pussy if we are still in a discipline session.
    Putting her hair in two ponytails is also helpful in almost any position for getting a handle on her face.

  5. My husband and I prefer our lovemaking to be separated from my submissiveness, plus he always finishes inside of me because we believe in having children to please the Lord. Him finishing elsewhere means we are putting ourselves in control of whether my womb is filled, not God. However, at times when I can’t get pregnant (such as during a pregnancy – I am currently expecting our seventh child- or when I’m on my period) I will pleasure him orally. I can definitely understand what you mean about the position being naturally a submissive one! I take great pleasure in giving my husband pleasure. It not only makes him feel good, it makes me feel confident in my submission to him.

    1. Thank you Valerie. Congratulations on your coming child! Praise God. I hope you can let us know when your child is born.

      That’s a very good way that you and your husband do things. We also believe in having many children. Giving head is definitely deeply satisfying to both, and helps build a woman’s submission. Your husband is very blessed to have you.

  6. I love this article, thank you. I have always felt that pleasing my husband orally made me have a better submissive attitude toward him, and I have learned to never say no to him. He has only paddled and/or spanked me a couple of times. Both were very short sessions and he was tearing up, not me. Clearly he doesn’t feel comfortable doing this but, oh, how I wish he would. We are older and I am very set in my rebellious ways. I truly desire change and growth in this area but I know I could sure use his help more often. Bless you for writing on this subject.

    1. Thank you for writing. Your husband must be very happy to be married to a woman like you. He should treasure you. I believe nearly any woman can appreciate the deeply submissive nature of the act and be fulfilled in it.

      If your husband is open-minded about learning more about discipline, please let him know he is welcome to write me. I know with the Lord’s grace, and your man’s guidance, you can move far past your “rebellious ways,” and experience deep growth. His guidance, through discipline or otherwise, is very important for you.


  7. My husband and I were both raised up been taught that this is wrong

  8. Being taught I meant

  9. We were both taught that oral sex is not a plan that God had intended between married people So we don’t have this in our life I’m not judging anyone else for having that in their life not at all am I judging I’m just saying my husband and I don’t have this type of thing in our marriage so I’ll probably have to decline any further on commenting on this one my husband probably wouldn’t be too happy if I continued to comment on this type of thing ( no disrespect intended toward anyone)

    1. That’s fine Jaime. I understand. There are others that believe the same way. The traditional belief in Christian history is that it is wrong to do to completion, since the sex act should be open to life. So it may be practiced to raise excitement, but the man should complete the act in the normal way. However, there are those who believe it’s always wrong anyway. I’m sure you respect your husband’s lead on this. Blessing to you both.

      1. Yes We both believe the same way as we were both raised up together in the same church same Christian school we have known each other since we were five years old back in 1985

        1. That’s wonderful you’ve known each other so long. Praise God. It is also helpful to be raised up in the same teaching. Being united on faith is of the greatest value in marriage.

  10. Thank you

    Thank you for this article. It is interesting and helpful.

    We are a disciplined household, but not Christian.

    My husband spanks my bottom when necessary with his hand, his belt or, if necessary with a cane.

    I don’t think that words can ever be enough to thank him for my correction. When he has completed the discipline, I say thank you and then I kneel before him and take him in my mouth.

    In the way that I have been trained I suck and lick, using my lips and tongue to give as much pleasure as I can. If he wants to press into my throat I still sometimes gag a little, but I am able to receive him.

    Unless my husband tells me not to, I always swallow my husband’s ejaculate. I want to have some of him inside me and I believe it would be a rejection of him if I did not take him to completion. I would never consider spitting out his semen or allowing it to spill from my mouth.

    Oral thanks is an important part of my devotion to my husband.

    One thing which may be controversial for some couples is that there have been a few occasions when my husband did not consider punishment of my bottom to be sufficient. On those occasions he has given me a few strokes of his belt on my breasts.

    This is more painful than on my bottom and it marks more. I like this because I see the marks above my blouse for several days and that reminds me of my correction.

    Careful discipline and loving thanks have strengthened our love and our marriage.

    1. Thank you. I’m very glad you found the article helpful. I believe that kind of service helps a woman greatly to grow in submission. It sounds like your husband leads you very well, and that you are devoted to him.

      I do not recommend applying punishment anywhere else than the bottom, especially because of safety concerns, but I am aware that many couples practice it. Oral is a most appropriate way for a wife to express her gratitude after a spanking. It shows her new and better attitude she will have as well.

      Feel free to comment anytime.

      1. Thank you for your reply.

        I understand your concern about safety. My husband would never do anything to cause me damage.

        I have received breast punishment on about four occasions. Each time it is with his belt and it has either been two or four strokes. This leaves quite bright marks, but it doesn’t cause heavy bruising. As I said, I like it because I can see the marks as I go about my normal duties in the house. If I go out I cover them up.

        I am required to put my hands under my breasts to hold them in position and ensure that the strokes are delivered accurately

        It is an effective correction for which I am thankful. It is also wonderful when my husband kisses my breasts when they are still carrying his marks.

        Flesh heals well and completely whether it is on the bottom or the breast. I don’t think any permanent harm will come from limited punishment of my breasts with a leather belt.

        I hope that I don’t deserve punishment too often or too severely, but if I do my husband will do it in a safe and loving way. I am happy with his decisions.

        I will thank him orally to the best of my ability for every correction I receive.

  11. While it is the duty of parents to provide a well-trained, submissive and just spanked bride to her husband on the wedding day, obviously oral training is a task for her husband only. Even given a good minster willing to be open and honest about gender roles, a rare thing BTW, oral training will not likely be a topic of discussion Therefore, generally oral training is solely the job of the husband often without any guidance at all. Therefore, I am glad Aron is willing to discuss this sensitive topic.

    Jane did discuss this with our daughters right before their marriage when she talked to them of all the sensitive topics of the marriage bed. I stayed away from these discussions completely as I felt strongly this was not a proper topic to for me to be involved with.

    I did learn, after we married that Jane had in fact been talked to by her mother about pleasing me orally when I demanded it. I do not know how detailed this discussion was. Of course, talking and doing are not the same thing, I did have to train Jane about what I expected. For example, I did not want to see one drop of semen go anywhere but down her throat. She had trouble with this at first but some extra motivation with the strap turned out to be a good teaching aid

    I rarely demand oral sex after a correction, and since I use extended corner time in a common room after a spanking, there is no place for it in my normal punishment protocol. But it is not too unusual after a correction and corner time and after Jane is done with her bath that she will ask me, “may I please you sir” She is often desirous of intimacy after her bath after a correction. Corner time is for reflection penance and giving her time to stop crying , which she always does after a correction, Intimacy for us is well after the correction is over,

    1. When I got married I didn’t know anything about oral sex other than badly informed chat among girls of my own age. I expected that it might be something my husband may want or need, but I had no idea what I had to do.

      Parents really should make sure that their daughters understand that this is a very important part of their relationship with their husband and that they should ready themselves to do it eagerly and take guidance from him on how to give the greatest compliance with his requirements.

      However well informed a woman may be before she marries, and I think that preparation will always be very helpful, she will still need to be trained by her husband in the techniques he requires for him to be fully satisfied with her.

      Just as with Bob, my husband has me swallow his semen when he takes me orally. At first I felt a bit unsure about this, but it was never unpleasant, as I had feared. Actually, I now love to taste and swallow his ejaculate. The pleasure I give to him is hugely rewarding to me and I really cherish the feeling that I have part of him in my stomach although he is away working. It makes us together even when we have to be apart.

      I wish that I was better prepared to serve my husband orally. I am sure that every woman needs to be trained in the specific needs of her man, but certainly needed more training because I had not received any informed guidance earlier. I was taught when to use my tongue and when to suck. I had to learn how to relax my throat so that I could take him deep without gagging and if I did have a throat spasm to make sure that I didn’t allow any of his semen to escape from my mouth.

      I always give oral thanks after any punishment or correction and I like to give oral stimulation before and during all of our love making. I feel so close and loved by my husband whenever I am licking him or taking him and his product in my mouth.

      1. Thank you for sharing your experience. I think your perspective will help some women who have doubts or worries about oral feel more confident. A husband who is a good teacher will help too. Even a woman who is comfortable and skilled at giving oral will learn the specific tastes and needs of her husband, and take pleasure in meeting them. It is a joy to see her learn and grow from it. Peace.

      2. Amen! I think parents should definitely talk about oral to their daughters beforehand. Not really details or anything because every guy is different in what pleases them orally. But just telling them how crucial oral is in marriage and how it links to being submissive wives/helpmeets.

  12. Captain Zeus Avatar
    Captain Zeus

    Oral training was a great read and I agree this is a wife’s duty. Do you have suggestions on getting her past any rejection of bathing her man’s balls and bunghole as he instructs or refusing to swallow his semen. My wife has been slowly learning with more severe spanks for each infraction.

    1. Hello Zeus, I’m really glad you enjoyed the article on wife training. I cannot emphasize enough how giving oral helps her with her submission.

      I have not had problems with a woman learning to submit orally. That is true both of marriage, and of women I knew before marriage. I find that a submissive wife, who has accepted her man’s headship of her, easily submits to giving oral, and will listen to her man’s instructions about how he wants it done.

      If she is rejecting this, it may be that she has not clearly been taught her submissive role yet, or fully embraced it. She may also lack clear instructions on what to do. While I have never had to spank my wife for refusal to perform sexually, certainly refusal is worthy of a spanking as well as further training. I have had to correct my wife on a few things about how she performs it, but she has always been willing to learn to do it right for me. She will do it how I prefer it.

      Regarding other requirements of her: I do not recommend asking your wife to practice anal-lingus, as the anus is dirty, and is built to expel waste. I wouldn’t ask a wife to do than any more than ask her to lick the floor. She could become sick as well.

      I hope you both continue to grow in your roles as man and wife, and as leader and helper in marriage. Continue to lead her. I believe she will learn to fully serve you orally and do it for your pleasure.

      Feel free to write with any other questions. Take care.

    2. OnlyHis Avatar

      Some will disagree with this, but it works for us. I do what Captain Zeus wants his wife to do and I think it is the right thing.

      I don’t have to do corner time and I do not have my mouth washed with soap or have to keep soap in my mouth. I should make it clear that we both make ourselves very clean before any sort of activity. If I use my mouth in a way that I shouldn’t, whether it is cursing or saying something I shouldn’t, my husband sets me a correction.

      This will usually involve the use of his belt or cane, but because of the nature of the offence I will have a set time in which I must put my tongue in his bottom. I have to set the kitchen timer for the length required, usually somewhere between ten and twenty minutes, then I spread his buttocks and lick or point my tongue to press into him.

      Of course, this could be dirty, but not if properly prepared. For me, this form of penance reinforces how I should behave very effectively. It is my husband that I have offended by my behaviour and it is him that should receive my contrition. I know it is a pleasurable sensation for him and I love being able to give him that as a compensation for what I have done. When the time is up I take my husband in my mouth for him to complete.

  13. Steffan Avatar

    When oral-training my wife, I found it helpful to begin each session by requiring her to get down on all-fours and crawl around the bedroom for a few minutes.

    This served several purposes. First, she learned the importance of entertaining her husband by literally being on display for his visual pleasure.

    Second, she learned to obey every command: “Pause!”, “Turn!”, “Quicker!”, “Slower!”.

    Third, her mindset was suitably submissive when the oral training commenced.

    1. Thank you. That’s always a good thing to mix in with training. I can see how it helps.

  14. talltaurus Avatar

    I do like this idea. I do like to take my time with oral training. Have her really work. Lots of saliva. Do you make sure yours swallows at the end? This is important and takes her practice but be patient.

    1. Yes, it’s important for her to spend time with pleasing her man, develop skill, and learn what you like her to do most. I think it’s good for a wife to learn to swallow, and it is appropriate to what she is learning, but some men don’t believe in that. I make sure she drains the last drop. Women can learn to love giving head, and embrace their submission that way.

  15. My wife though trained to be submissive to male authority had trouble with swallowing during oral sex. At first I was patient but eventually I was forced to use the strap to train her. It only took two strappings to get the result I wanted. I think it should be the job of the mother to inform every daughter the ins and outs of oral sex. Jane’s mother did talk to Jane about oral sex and her duty to please her husband but of course if a wife has trouble in this area it becomes the duty of the husband to train her.

    1. talltaurus Avatar

      Yes I like this approach Bob. While her mom likely didn’t go far enough with her training, accepting swallowing through male discipline would have been a good learning experience for her.

    2. I can’t stress enough how important it is for parents to talk about this with their daughters before marriage. Crucial foundation.

      1. It is crucial, KB. I was very lucky that my parents talked to me about this before I got married. Mom was super helpful in showing me what I needed to do. That said, like Bob’s Jane, my husband had to use his belt on me a few times before I got it right on exactly how he wanted to be pleasured. It’s so easy to get distracted by his beautiful body and to do what you want with it or think he might like instead of taking his direction.
        I can only imagine how challenging this is for girls who weren’t raised in a CDD family. Their husbands must have a lot of patience, because I’m sure it takes a long time to train them properly–it’s taken me long enough to learn the new rules and my daddy spanked me for as long as I can remember. And he made sure to whip my ass good just before walking me down the aisle. I’m sure the guests thought those were tears of joy for seeing my husband! They were by the end of the ceremony, but not at the start!

  16. Katrin it’s my opinion that every Christian bride should walk down the aisle with a sore behind to enforce in her mind the true purpose of the marriage ceremony, the transfer of the authority from her father to her husband. A husband’s authority is far greater then her father’s and she must come to understand this. I commend your father.

  17. […] have her serve you sexually, never going too long between sessions. Keep her regularly on her knees giving pleasure, and she will remember that fulfilling position. It taps into her longing to serve you. It helps […]

  18. Do you have any more articles on throat training? Its not talked about enough in its benefits of a wife’s submission.

    1. Hi KB, Thank you for visiting my website. I make mention of learning to take it in the throat in one or two of the articles on sexual submission. It is a great way for a woman to learn to give herself completely, and to show her submission. It is also an incredible sensation for the man receiving it.

      I do not have any articles uniquely on that subject though, since I don’t view it as a major topic. I’m glad you mention it though, and I think wives will learn to do that over time, as their husbands teach them.

  19. Before I got married my mom talked to me about my duties in pleasing my husband and she told me about pleasing Bob orally if he wanted me too. I didn’t know very much about these things. This was something I heard about in school , because there is always talk there about sex, but I didn’t know I was supposed to do this if Bob wanted me to. My mom said I should do this after my wedding night spanking but Bob didn’t spank me at all when we first got married. And he didn’t ask me to do this either. But when Bob starting taking the strap to me , after a while he told me to do this. I didn’t like it to be truthful but when I didn’t do it right Bob took the strap to me. Now I do it any time Bob wants and when I mess up I ask him if I can do this to say I am sorry. Bob had me talk to all our daughters about their duties before they got married and he said be sure they understand how to please their husbands this way. So I told them how I messed up when I had to do this and how I got the strap. I told them it isn’t really bad , and I gave them the same advice my mom gave me. This is not something we talk about so I don’t know anything about our daughters and this. It’s not something you talk about , not like getting a spanking which we talk about all the time, this is private.

    1. It is good that you have given guidance to your daughters Jane. Women need to know what to expect before they marry and they should be ready to meet their husband’s needs.

      A man will sometimes need oral stimulation to be ready for other penetration and it will sometimes be enough just to bring him to completion with your mouth. I wasn’t as well prepared for marriage as I would have like to have been and I was uncomfortable about taking my husband in my mouth at first. When my husband first ejaculated in my mouth I didn’t like it and I passed it into a tissue.

      We discussed this after and I understood that I was being disrespectful. By putting my husband’s semen in a tissue I was rejecting him when I should receive his product as readily into my stomach as I do into my womb. I received the belt to reinforce this lesson, but that may not really have been necessary. Having talked about it I fully understood what my husband’s feelings were. I should always be ready to to receive him in every way and I should never let him feel that I am disposing of any part of him.

      I soon realised that my initial reluctance came from ignorance. The taste of ejaculate is not unpleasant and swallowing it is not difficult. I have come to love my husband taking me orally as much as any sex. More actually. His penis feels firm, but silky smooth in my mouth. I have a wonderful feeling of satisfaction if he is soft when I start to suck and he grows big and hard from my sucking and licking.

      Sometimes my husband allows me to suck him and work to please him as much as I can. Other times he takes hold of my head and penetrates my mouth and throat in the same way as he would at the other end. This is something that a wife needs to learn. At first I gagged and spluttered and it took a while to get over that. Now I can take my husband as hard as he wants to give it to me in my throat. I know that when he is doing this he is loving it and loving me. We are never closer than when he has used my mouth how he wants and I have his sperm inside me.

      I know that many couples keep sex and punishment or correction completely separate. I understand and respect that decision, but for me it is the most natural thing after my husband has disciplined me that I drop to my knees and thank him orally. In doing this he knows that I am accepting his correction and showing that I love him for it.

      1. Amen! Seems like you have a very blessed and amazing marriage. Oral sex is so crucial to understand and see how it correlates to a wife’s submission in marriage. It does take a while to train your throat but once your husband can take you as hard as he pleases its really amazing! God bless!

  20. talltaurus Avatar

    Jane and Only his. Thank you for sharing. It’s good to hear a woman’s thoughts on her oral training as part of her submission and learnings in performing it properly under her husbands guidance. It’s great your mother’s had a talk but every man may have different requirements from how your father had your mother perform it.

    As a man, my wife also had trouble with deep throating, spending time on my balls and swallowing. I incorporated oral training into maintenance spankings where she would verbally repeat my detailed instruction on what I wanted before getting down on hers knees.

    1. Yes, it can be very helpful for a woman to learn from another trusted woman about these things before marriage. She’ll feel more prepared and less nervous about it. A husband’s clear instructions also help a wife to learn, and it is natural it takes some time for her to grow fully comfortable, and to pick up techniques. The three you mention take time to learn for many women. A husband’s guidance can really bring out the best in her.

    2. Yes, men have different needs and women have different capabilities. However well they may have been prepared for marriage by their parents or other responsible adults, new wives need to be trained in what pleases their husband and they have to work on gaining the skills required to satisfy him.

      Our daughter is grown and married now. She has told me several times how glad she was that we taught her as much about sex in marriage as we could. Her husband had some life experience before they married and he knew what he hoped for in their intimacy. She tells me that she meets his every need and he certainly seems contented.

      They do not have children yet and they have their own home so they have plenty of opportunity to show their love to each other physically. My daughter says that her husband sometimes has her naked around the house when he is not at work and sexual activity will happen frequently then.

      I like to kneel to take my husband in my mouth. It feels right. However, most of the time it happens when we are lying in bed. Sometimes he likes me on my back with my head hanging over the edge so that my mouth and throat are in a straight line for him to enter. This way he can see and feel my throat bulge. That pleases him.

      Another thing is that people want different things at different times. My husband gives me instructions on exactly what he wants. I don’t refuse anything. Like anyone else, I don’t always feel like doing what he wants at the same time as he needs it, but I find that getting on and doing it soon results in my mood changing and I feel better.

      He is the initiator, but very occasionally I would like sex. When that happens I will ask his permission. For example, ‘may I suck you please?’ I can’t remember him denying me.

      I don’t think anything sexual is dirty, We make ourselves very clean before sex and we are both healthy. That, and the knowledge that my husband would never do me permanent harm, means that we can meet every desire. Saying that he wouldn’t permanently harm me may sound a bit wrong. Of course he hurts me sometimes when I am disciplined. but that is for my, and our, benefit. It can look like harm while the marks remain, but it isn’t.

      1. That is awesome that talking about sex to your daughter has paid off, so many people fail to see the importance.

  21. iamhissubmissive60 Avatar

    I appreciate all of you ladies here taking the time to.share with other wives such as myself just how you go about giving head and pleasuring your husband’s this way. Our sexual life is surely diffrent from most of you here. If it were all up to me, I would be on my knees frequently serving him this way and any other way he would desire. But, it is happening not just as frequent as I would like, but 1 thing has certainly changed and I am grateful for that and that he finally sees the need to discipline me when I step outside the boundaries and even though it hurts always it is for my benefit in my submission. My desire is to be very submissive it is a very beautiful thing to want to honor my husband in all things.

  22. Performing oral on my husband is not about doing him a favor, its submitting fully. Giving him this pleasurer lets me show how much I love and care for him. And I dont have to guess on that he is satisficed with the amount he gets since he can command it whenever he wants and its not on my burden. Almost every time we watch tv he orders me to either kneel on the floor in front of him or lay next to him and take him in my mouth. He have trained me to know how he wants it so most of the time he lets me do my work and we can go on for a very long time and it feels almost meditative for me, only occasionally interrupted by his command of speed or depth. I know some of my friends have trouble swallowing but for me its an important step, firstly since my husband wants me to do it but also the feeling afterwards to have his taste in my mouth and a bit of him in my belly. His default way of telling me he is about to climax is his hands in a strong grip on my head, either holding me deep down or with only the tip inside and just saying “swallow” or “keep”. If he want me to keep it I do now swallow it immediately but keeps it in my mouth until given permission and then show it to him before swallowing it down. Even if I do enjoy giving my mouth to him Im not so fond of when he pushes me all the way down. Im getting better at it so the training has paid off but I still earn a spanking from time to time for dropping him out of my mouth when gagging. It have happened a few times that I gag when he climax and lost some of his fluid, apart from the embarrassing feeling of failing one of my most important tasks that also always result in a hard spanking and for a couple of days after all oral requires me to lay on my back on either the bed or the couch with my head over the edge and told to “open wide” for him to train my throat. Its hard since he will go deep almost the whole session but in the end its for my own best and it helps me focus on doing better next time, I know he also likes it better slowly so it more of a lesson for me that a pleasurer for him.

    1. Your lives seem so much like ours Sandra. Many times I will spend much of the evening lying on the couch with my head in his lap giving him the best oral I can. After many years I can take him easily into my throat without gagging and, just like you, I know when he is about to climax when he takes my head firmly in his hands and works it exactly how he wants until he fills my mouth or sends it straight down my throat.

      My husband always kisses me very passionately after he has finished in my mouth. Also like you, he sometimes tells me to hold it in my mouth and show him before I swallow. Sometimes he has me hang my head over an edge so he can use my mouth with hard penetration. In the early days this could be difficult, but not now. I don’t gag or spill his semen. My spankings are for other reasons. Lol.

      I know what you mean about being meditative. Sucking on him makes me feel very calm and contented. I feel loved, protected and desired. Having him in my mouth and stomach is the best thing.

      1. hamiltonman Avatar

        This is my preferred way with my wife–head hanging over the edge on her back. As well as the feeling of being able to go deep, I love the look as my cock create a bulge in her throat.

  23. jbratland Avatar

    I love your website. My husband and I are new to domestic discipline and it is beyond transformative. We look forward to learning more.

    1. Welcome. I’m very happy to hear the website helps you learn. That’s why I started it and spend time maintaining it. Congratulations on beginning discipline in your home!

  24. I appreciate the perspectives of both husbands and wives on the importance of oral sex in a DD or CDD marriage- how it reinforces the gender roles and serves as a proper expression of gratitude by a recently disciplined wife. I’m curious if any husband grooms their genitals or alters their diet to make it easier for their wife to perform oral sex and swallow or if it’s expected that their wife’s nose will be tickled and her tongue flavored with her husband’s natural scent and taste? And regarding grooming, for wives, is it more submissive for them to trim their pubic hair or shave it bare weekly or have it waxed regularly? When doing corner time and kneeling do they feel more submissive and naked if they shaved it
    bare or more shamed and treated like a child if they keep a landing strip?

    1. Hi Doug, I know there are husbands who do all of those practices. Some try shaving either to meet their preferences, or make a woman appear more childlike. I do not believe in shaving off the hair, as I think we should respect the way God made us. It’s healthy and normal for both men and women to have hair where God gave it to them. A woman is not meant to look like a manikin or a small child. As far as changing the diet to taste better, it can definitely work to improve things. You can alter diet to remove some bitterness or add sweetness. But I don’t think it will ever be easy for her until she just has experience with it. Thanks for your questions.

  25. Hi Aron. Thank you for your website. Although my wife and I have practiced domestic discipline since we married almost 5 years ago, your work has really helped me become a better husband and leader for our family over the past year. Regarding this topic of oral training, my wife has come a long way and has gotten quite skilled since I introduced it to our relationship maybe six months ago. For the first several months, I requested oral submission approximately three times a week and after she finished corner time for any spankings. She has always complied, but has expressed a couple of times that it’s not her favorite.

    Then back in January, she offered to provide oral for the first time without my request (on my birthday). It was amazing, and I enjoyed it much more without have to ask for it. It really helps her practice being submissive. So the following day we had a talk and agreed that she would begin offering oral sex to me frequently. In doing so, I’ve stopped ordering her to get on her knees (except after a spanking), but she has never offered again. I’ve verbally reminded her about her responsibility to offer twice, and both times she has apologized and pleasured me. But now it’s been two more weeks with nothing. I know she does not really enjoy it, so I suspect she is just waiting until I ask, then she’ll apologize and comply. But that’s deliberately disobeying me based on her rules.

    Is this a spankable offense? Or should I just suck it up and not worry about getting her to offer it unprovoked, and just go back to requesting it multiple times a week? I don’t want to be unrealistic, but it doesn’t seem like that hard of a request. Any thoughts or suggestions would be helpful. Thank you again for your site.

    1. Hello David, That’s an interesting question. I think it really depends what your goals are. If you simply want to see her do it of her own accord, then it would be counter productive to demand it, or punish for not doing it. That’s not the same thing as doing it on her own. However, if the goal is more to train her to serve you that way, then naturally, you tell her she has to do it, and she needs to obey. Disobedience is punished.

      I do not personally recommend doing oral training frequently, except early in a marriage, when a wife is learning to submit, or similar times when she needs training. I find that the marriage bed itself, quite naturally, provides plenty of training for a woman. She should just be able to be comfortable responding to your commands, and serving you orally when you send her on her knees. But it’s up to you really, depending on what you wish, and what you find helpful in her learning.

      As I say elsewhere, I recommend instructing her while she is serving you. Tell her what she needs to do. Give her some encouragement as well. I find a woman will serve better when she has that verbal engagement from her man. Over time I think you will be very pleased with how she responds, and with her skills also increasing. She will learn to pleasure you well, and learn exactly what you love and do it for you.

      I hope that helps offer some ideas for the situation. I think it will be well for both of you.

    2. talltaurus Avatar

      I went through a similar process with my wife. I agree when you say performing oral is likely “not her favourite”. A woman may initially have this opinion, but it’s her duty to perform this often and listen to her man. I would spank her to reinforce the need for enthusiasm and taking you deep as well as swallowing – typically where the woman may require regular sessions and discipline to properly service your needs. I’d be interested in any updates.

    3. I agree with TallT and Aron mostly, but I wanted to reaffirm it is the wife’s responsibility to meet the husband’s needs. Obviously, if a husband’s “needs” are sinful or would be against the Word, these should not be called “needs” at all. Outside of that, it is a command that a man is in charge and his needs are met.
      Your need, to have your wife offer and request to service you orally is without a doubt a normal need. If you don’t want to have to ask everytime then she should meet this need. She should be meeting your need on a weekly basis.
      It seems from what you have written that she is deliberately disobeying. Therefore, discipline is in order until she meets this need. I would recommend spanking and clear communication why she is receiving spanking and that it is expected that after the spanking she will request to pleasure you with her mouth. Every two days, if she has not offered (without a spanking) to service you, then the process will be repeated with increasing pain, until she gives in, repents, and forms the right habits around your righteous needs.
      I would be remiss if I did not mention as well that she should be swallowing every drop of your goodness to show her complete submission every time. This is a little way some wives try to show rebelling and not submit fully.
      My wife, when we were first married did have to be trained to offer and after a few weeks it became an ingrained habit and has continued throughout our years of marriage. She has come to look forward to performing her wifely duty 2-3 times/week and it gives her complete joy and peace to be meeting my needs. I pray that same for you.
      As TallT said, an update on progress would be appreciated if available.

      1. OnlyHis Avatar

        We are not Christian, but I think the same applies. For a marriage to work well and last, a wife needs to ensure that her husband’s needs are met and her own happiness depends on him being contented.

        At the beginning of our marriage I had heard about oral sex from other girls, but didn’t really know much. It would have been better if my mother had given me a full understanding of what I should do when I was married, but she didn’t. We put that right with our own daughter and she has a very happy marriage.

        To be honest it was a bit of a shock the first time I had semen in my mouth and I didn’t know what to do. I got a tissue and spat it out. It was just that I didn’t know you could swallow it. My husband was very understanding, but he made it clear what I needed to do and that spitting out his product was not respectful. Of course that upset me.

        From there, we went through a course of training. I received him orally every day while he guided my technique. Telling me how to use my tongue, teaching me to take it deep into my throat, and learning to overcome my gag reflex. He taught me how to bring him to completion entirely with my mouth, and only use my hands if he wanted me to.

        I never found the taste of his semen unpleasant so that wasn’t a problem. Sometimes he likes me to show it to him in my mouth so I wait for him to tell me before swallowing. After that training, I would almost always take my husband in my mouth at the beginning of intimacy. Sometimes he would like that to be all I did and finish in my mouth, but other times he would complete elsewhere. We have been married a long time and I still do oral sex more than once every week.

        Having my husband in my mouth and his semen in my stomach makes me feel really happy and reinforces our love. I don’t really see why any wife wouldn’t want it. It is as natural and necessary as kissing his mouth.

        During the training time when we were first married, my husband spanked me to remind me when I had not performed well. That helped to fix what was needed in my mind. After that, we settled into a routine of maintenance which I understand is quite common among couples. Once a week I have a discipline session to remind me to keep up standards. Apart from that, I am not disciplined very often these days. I know my job and I do it pretty well. Sometimes my husband might just like to spank me. I’m OK with that and he can do it how he likes.

  26. momred1906 Avatar

    Sherrie here. I was taught to swallow for a man’s seed is a gift to women. The first time I spit it out, I received a severe belt whipping because I disrespected my husband After that I swallowed and was grateful for my husband’s seed And to pleasure him for accepting me as his wife. Sherrie

    1. Amen! Very few things are more disrespectful then spitting out your husband’s seed. Swallowing is a must in a biblical marriage.

      1. A loving and submissive wife will definitely take pride in satisfying her man, and doing it just as he likes. As far as swallowing, once a man’s finished, it’s a good idea she keeps her lips around his member an extra ten or twenty seconds to drain him completely. That way she’s doing a thorough job.

      2. OnlyHis Avatar

        Like Sherrie, I only failed to swallow once. In my case that was because I didn’t have much knowledge and I didn’t know that it could be swallowed. I would never want to be disrespectful to my husband and I agree that failing to swallow is disrespectful.

        Two things would help. New wives would be fully prepared for married life if parents informed their daughters thoroughly about how to meet the needs of their husbands long before they get to the point of being married. This includes letting them know that oral sex is part of a loving relationship and the product of that is fine to swallow.

        Secondly, new wives who have not had the benefit of fully understanding sexual roles and duties should be lovingly trained by their new husbands. Training may include physical correction when standards are not met, but the important thing is for the couple to both understand that the purpose of the training is to ensure that both become contented in an enduring and loving marriage.

        Although I had concerns when I was first married, I love oral sex and happily consume my husband’s semen. I know how to please him and it pleases me too.

        1. Those are some excellent ideas. I don’t doubt you do your best to please your husband, and that he is very happy with you. Sexual training is very useful for a new wife, both in terms of serving her husband orally, and learning to respond easily to sexual commands. A woman can find great satisfaction, and embody her submission, by serving her man sexually. A new husband is wise to guide his wife in her learning.

  27. Newboy Avatar

    My wife and I have been only trying CDD for a few months. She had performed oral sex on me before that time, but only enough to give me an erection and then she would usually hurt me with teeth or too much suction and thereby getting me to go from her mouth to her genitals instead.
    My new problem is that even though gives me oral after her spanking and she is enthusiastic she doesn’t seem to be able to make me climax and explode. I am too small to reach the back of her throat so I can’t take advantage of the tightness of her throat.
    I don’t want to look to porn, because I don’t want to get stuck on it and she won’t either.
    Do you have any resource recommendation’s to teach her how to imorose her game?

    1. Hello Newboy, I’m glad you have brought discipline into your marriage. Most couples I’ve spoken to found it helpful to them very quickly, even if they had obstacles to overcome. I hope you have found the same.

      As far as your wife learning to please you more with oral, there are a number of good resources out there online, and I don’t really plan to use this site for detailed instructions. I’m sure she will learn to please you better, and obviously you should not look to porn.

      The most important thing is that she will seek to serve you sexually and do her best. Many women find it fulfilling to perform for their husbands. It may help if you tell her what you like, and instruct her while she is going down on you. She will do all she can to meet your needs.

  28. Hello Aron,

    Sir, I have been reading your manual for a few weeks now and can’t thank you enough.

    A little bit of background on me. I am newly married (4 months ago) and am three months pregnant. My husband made it very clear that we would be practicing DD as soon as the wedding night and I agreed of course. I try my absolute best to please him and to be the most humble and submissive wife I can be, but our marriage is new and I am exhausted from the pregnancy. I often find myself getting spanked on top of my maintenance spankings and I honestly feel like a horrible wife sometimes for disappointing him so much.

    With oral service, he requires me to please him almost nightly before sex. Is it wrong that I sometimes wish I could ask not to? I am just so exhausted. I have never asked so far, but going by how things have gone in the past when I’ve asked, I am scared for a spanking. My bottom is always red and I sleep on my stomach (although I’m not sure how much longer I can do that). My husband is very loving and I am nothing but thankful for his leadership, but keeping up with the housework and sexually keeping his satisfied (sometimes multiple times a day) is exhausting. Is it okay to ask for a break a few nights a week?

    Thank you very much for everything

    1. Hello Nora, It’s very good to hear from you. I’m glad my writing has been helpful to you in your marriage. Congratulations on your young marriage and your child. Leadership, submission, and discipline will serve to bring great peace and closeness to your home. I’m always happy to see a new couple start out that way.

      I tend to think that the frequency of spankings you experience will go down with time, as that is the norm. However, I don’t know all the details of the situation. It’s possible your husband is being a bit excessive, and I don’t see anything wrong with asking him to spank you less frequently. I am not a big supporter of ongoing maintenance, unless there is a serious problem to be addressed. A loving husband should be able to listen to your realistic concerns without spanking you for respectfully bringing them up.

      As for frequency of sex, it’s normal for a young man to desire sex every day, even more than once a day. That’s a part of male sexuality. I know you do your best to please him. If you are really exhausted, there’s nothing wrong with asking him meekly if he could wait until the next day. Occasionally my wife asks me as well. However, do not make a fight out of it. Sex is a part of keeping a man happy in virtually any marriage. A lack of sex is usually a very bad sign for a marriage. Remember, when he’s older, intimacy won’t be as frequent, and you might miss it. Do your best to enjoy it while you both are young.

      I hope that offers some help for your concerns.


      1. Thank you so much for your reply, sir.

        My husband has stated that I will have maintenance once a week for the first year, but we will see how it goes with the pregnancy. I am worried about it but he said he knows best and didn’t like me mentioning it, so I trust him. The problem with me bringing up my concerns is that he listens, he is very loving, but he says it is disrespectful to think he is going overboard and that he knows best, which I know he does. So for now, I am focused on improving every day.

        I do not want to make a fight of it, so I am a little scared to ask, but I might try it in a day or two and see what happens. I want to make him happy and keep him happy, it’s just about how tired I am, nothing else. But I know God put me here to please him and keep him happy and I don’t want to take that from him, so I’ll do my best to keep going.

        I don’t want to burden you with too many questions, but I hope it’s okay if I tell a little more and ask another.

        I get spanked mostly for cooking things the wrong way or for not cleaning as thoroughly as he likes, but I am trying to just accept his decision with submission instead of disagreeing- I would say that’s my biggest struggle and how I end up in trouble. It’s just hard when I work hard on doing something and he gives me a warning for it and that’s when I end up in trouble- for disagreeing. My question is about nudity. I grew up in a strict household and so did he, so this is all new to us (since marriage). It feels really uncomfortable being nude at home, but he has recently started to tell me to keep my clothes off for most of the day. Do you think that’s excessive? I don’t want to cause a fight and he says it’s so he has easy access to me and that he likes to look while it’s just us at home, but it makes me feel even more exposed. It’s not every day, but it’s usually after he gets upset, or he uses it as a warning.

        I’m sorry for the long message, if it’s too much, please don’t worry about replying. I am just grateful for your site and all of the advice and knowledge you share with us. Thank you so much and have a blessed Sunday!

        1. That’s fine, Nora. Happy Sunday to you. I don’t mind the questions. It’s good that you submit to your husband’s decision, and understand he is the one to set the limits. You sound like you are seeking to be a very good wife. I know you do your best.

          In my mind, the regimen sounds a little excessive, as I view the bar for wives as basically being responsible, obedient, respectful, and honest. The bar to reach is virtue, not excellence in everything, or flawlessness. When the bar becomes very high, then everything might seem like an infraction, and punishment seems nearly inevitable. In general, it’s good for a man to have some guidance from other men, and this can help him see what the norm for discipline is, and what helpful practices are.

          I do not keep my wife nude except for unique training purposes or for punishment. I believe clothing is good even inside the home, as our daily interactions have nothing to do with sex or discipline. Very regular nudity then gives an unnatural focus to certain things, and distracts from other daily matters. Even as a matter of training or discipline, exactly how often to do it is a judgment call. How to handle your nudity is your husband’s decision, but it’s fine to talk things out in a meek and gentle manner with him.

          I know you will continue to do a good job, and grow in virtue as a wife.

    2. Your husband seems like a great man but I don’t see anything wrong with you respectfully asking for a rain check for the next morning or night. There might be a few nights since you’re pregnant that you might not be feeling well and he should be ok with that. But at the end of the day you have to respect his decision.

  29. Deserving Avatar


    I wanted to comment on Nora’s post. Nora, as someone who has practiced CDD for many years, just know that you are good. You seem to have the right mindset.

    From my experience, my advice would be to just be patient. As Aaron has mentioned a few times on this website, orally training is best at the beginning of the marriage. It won’t be needed forever- although always default to your husband. It was difficult at the beginning of my marriage too, and I got pregnant right away as well. I was tired, and didn’t always want to submit to my husbands oral training. I knew how important it was, and knew my husband knew best. But exhaustion is hard!

    I will tell you as someone who has not needed oral training for many years, when I look back I am grateful. Wife submission has so many benefits and oral training is essential for husbands so we know our place. My husband required for me to be on my knees for blowjob training because of the natural submissive position so that I would know my place. The further I got in my pregnancy, the worse it felt on my knees with my growing belly. One thing I learned after I was in the third trimester with a bigger belly, the oral training was effective in teaching me how to be on my knees for penetrative sex as well. Although we enjoy many sex positions now, my husband taught me at the start of marriage to be on all fours for regular penetrative sex so he could take from behind. Again, on my knees to better accept my place under his leadership. Also- easier access to my body with a big belly- not so easy in the missionary position!

    Try to be patient about being nude. Your husband must love you so much- wanting you to have no barriers between you. Think of it as a way to bare your soul and be ready for any sexual submission he needs. Nothing blocking his needs and your full focus on him. Oral training is for you to show your dedication to him and God. That’s what marriage is for a wife. Try your best to remember how lucky you are that you have a dominant husband instructing you in this special act of service.

    Please know My husband requires me to be nude for a blowjob. It helps him see me as a deserving wife. He loves to see me in that natural state and he often he tells me how proud he is of my naked body belonging to him.

    My last suggestion would be to pray. Pray that during this oral training time that you will receive specific instruction. Your husbands training is a gift! We know God commands us to submit sexually and how lucky are we that we have husbands to teach us how. With every command during my oral training- my skills grew, my love for my husband grew, and more importantly, I knew I was pleasing God.

    I will tell you- it’s for your own good. Your husband cares for you and try to remember that opening your mouth to receive his penis for blowjob training is like opening your heart to your real place in God’s Kingdom. Submit to him- it’s worth it!

    1. That’s very good counsel for her. Thank you, Deserving. Usually the intensity of training isn’t going to last forever.

    2. “Deserving” is a strong example of a submissive wife who truly appreciates her godly husband.

      She truly understands that her faithful oral service is a special gift for her – and her submissive attitude and spirit when she pleasing her husband is for her own good and opens herself up to great blessings. She recognizes how lucky she is to be able to have a husband that is godly and therefore deserves faithful oral service regularly. What a godly woman – and eloquent in her writing as well. Amen!

  30. John Miller Avatar
    John Miller

    So many great posts about the mutual satisfaction oral sex provides by Godly wife.
    We are older and one of most powerful stimulation methods still available to us is dirty talk.
    I love hearing her voice and referring to me as her earthly master or king (Jesus is her eternal master) and telling me what she wants to do to me.
    Any thoughts?

    1. Hello John, Thank you for your thoughts. I have long found that talk during sex is a good part of the excitement and the closeness involved. I find a woman responds well to it, whether it is verbal instructions, encouragement, or hearing that she belongs to her husband. Any couple ought to at least try it.

  31. Deserving Avatar


    I was wondering about swallowing after a blowjob. Sometimes orally serving my husband is for foreplay, but how about for training purposes or after my spankings, or for a full blowjob? Do you require your wife to swallow in those instances? As a Christian, is this required or important?

    It seems like there are a few post responses here and there but wondered from your experience and thoughts from the Bible.

    Thank you

    1. Hello Deserving, Thank you for your question. Swallowing is a topic that occasionally comes up. As a part of training, a woman should be accustomed to serving her husband orally when he desires it. It is up to a husband’s discretion whether he finishes in her mouth or not.

      A wife may be required to give head only for a short time, to show she submits sexually on command. She may be required to give a full blowjob. After a spanking, I always make sure it is a full blowjob, and my wife knows by now to expect she will have to finish it. However, during training, not always. Sucking may just be a practice in submission for her, and be fairly short.

      A wife should swallow, and do her best to drain every drop of it. Any woman can do that with some practice. I don’t think either option is more or less Christian. It is her submission and service which is most important, and is tied into the heart of the marriage. It is tied to the unity of body and soul that marriage is. Nevertheless, many Christians will never finish in the mouth, but only in her sex, since that is the main purpose of sex, and then the act can be open to creating new life. I respect that practice as well.

      1. Deserving Avatar

        Thank you for the reply. I know many husbands only allow the blowjob to be for foreplay and finishing has to be inside the woman to be open for the creation of life.

        My husbands has similar requirements as you. I have been taught to swallow every drop when it is a blowjob after a spanking or when he commands it as a service by itself.

        I appreciate your thoughts and counsel and wondered if we were acting against God in your view. My husband has never said anything specific to this, but hearing you say it is not more or less Christian is a relief. I value your feedback and counsel. Thank you.

        1. It’s my pleasure. I am so glad that you have your husband to lead you in love, and that you are fulfilled in submitting to him. Both of you can delight in that form of service. It sounds like a wonderful marriage.

  32. My oral training was probably the hardest part for me. Prior to meeting my husband I had not enjoyed giving oral sex and rarely did. I actually met my husband while I was visiting his church. His wife had died 3 years before of cancer and I had been divorced for almost 2 years. We began to talk and began to date. He told me all about his DD lifestyle with his wife before she passed and he said that he was looking for another DD relationship. I had never heard of it and so he taught me all about it. As we began to get closer I decided that it was something I wanted to try. We started sleeping together and moved in together. He started training me in dd right away. We both felt terribly guilty about doing this before we were married so we got married shortly after. As soon as we were married he began Intense dd training and oral training. It was all very overwhelming. the oral training was actually harder for me than the discipline although I was sometimes getting paddled 5 or 6 times A-day. I had to wear a dress or skirt with nothing under it at all times so he could easily lift it to swat my butt. He carried a small paddle in his back pocket so he could have it ready. I got no warnings but i knew all the rules and what would get me spanked. It wasn’t until a few weeks later when the swatting had lessened that he introduced sending me the bedroom to undress and kneel before he came and gave me a long hard spanking. That was very difficult and still is! For the oral training he would have me randomly drop to my knees and put himself in my mouth. Sometimes just for a short time and the other times he would spend a great deal of time in my mouth and finish there. He never had issue with finishing there because we are both past the point of having children as we both have grown kids already. I however had never swallowed a man’s semen before And I was really struggling. He was firm and constant in my training and after what felt like a very long time to me I was able to pleasure him without gagging and swallow without spitting it back out again. Thankfully he waited until after this initial training to teach me how to take him deep into my throat and it is still a struggle for me sometimes. We’ve been married for three years now and I am still learning. He takes my mouth frequently. Sometimes briefly as foreplay during sex other times he has me undress and kneel in front of him so he can use my mouth while he’s watching the news or a game. Also, I have to give him head after he spanks me. I’d say he’s in my mouth most days in some way. I still struggle with it sometimes but I know I need to honor him by submitting and it is definately easier now than it was when we first married. I’m grateful for the intense training in the beginning. I think it really helped me to understand how I needed to submit my will and my body to him as the head of our household. I must add that he has always lead me in prayer and Bible study from our first date. He’s a great guy and I am crazy about him and try really hard to please him and submit to him. I love your manual. I’ve only read maybe half but I’m working my way through it and talking to my husband about the articles. He asked me the other day when we were talking… what is Aron’s view on this topic? I said I didn’t know but I’d find out!

    1. Thank you for your comment, Margaret. I’m very glad you enjoy this discipline manual. Living in submission, and being corrected can be a difficult adjustment, even when a woman understands it’s good for her. Some adjust more quickly than others. I don’t think deep throat is easy for any woman, but from what I have seen it helps to have time to warm up, and gradually work up to it. I appreciate your commitment to submission and your devotion to your husband. It would not be possible without it.

    2. OnlyHis Avatar

      Congratulations Margaret on finding a man you love and on dealing with your training so well. I think it was easier for me. Although I knew nothing about oral sex before we married, I never found it unpleasant or particularly difficult. I didn’t know that women swallowed semen, but it didn’t taste much and I learned to swallow without spilling quite quickly. Of course, I was corrected when I didn’t do it well, but I never needed as much as five or six paddlings in one day. That is a lot to endure. Very well done for getting through that and I’m glad that it is less frequent now.

      Men vary in size and I don’t have experience of others, but taking my husband into my throat without gagging or coughing him out did take me a little while. Now it is easy and perfectly natural for him to use my mouth just as firmly as the other end. Sometimes he does that with my head hanging down over the edge of the bed so that he can see and feel my throat bulging as he enters it. My throat doesn’t tighten at all. If he finishes like that I don’t taste him. Usually, he will pull back into my mouth before he finishes, and I like that a bit better. I get to feel what he has given me in my mouth and sometimes he tells me to show him before I swallow.

      However deep the love between a couple, it needs to be reinforced regularly. Giving oral to your husband is probably the best way to continually reinforce your love for him and your devotion. For me it is just as important as hugging and kissing. I have my husband in my mouth almost every day and I miss it if it doesn’t happen for any reason.

      Just one other point for younger couples. Having your man finish in your mouth is the most natural way of managing your family size. It leaves you and your husband happy, and it has no side effects.

      Like Margaret, I spend a lot of time in loose clothing without underwear so as to be available quickly whenever needed. I am pleased to say that after many years I am still needed very often. I don’t need correction so often these days, but whenever I do, I always give thanks for my spanking orally. You know what I mean. I say it and suck it.

      1. Margret Avatar

        Hi Onlyhis. Thanks, I do love him like crazy and I think I did get through my initial training better than I thought I would but now it’s 3 years later and I am struggling with my attitude. Thanks for sharing your experiences. It always helps to hear other woman talk about how they submit to their husband’s.

    3. talltaurus Avatar

      I have been giving my wife oral training for about six months. We are older with grown daughters each. She knew coming into marriage that I require this as part of being the HOH. I reciprocate as part of lovemaking but during discipline the blowjob after is to reinforce submissiveness and our connection. The first few times after we married I simply told her during, “you’re going to be doing this often” as I instructed her on what to do. Some women require discipline mixed in with their oral training but a red bottom does motivate attention to detail and learning to swallow. I hope you’re doing well in your situation.

  33. rickmorganhoh Avatar

    When my wife and I were dating and we began talking about CDD, she was unfamiliar having come from an unchristian 1st marriage where her husband treated her poorly cheated on her and ended up leaving her. We started talking about sex and discipline and she explained to me how she used oral as a way to manipulate her husband and other men she had dated. Giving it when she wanted something and withholding it when she was angry. I needed to make certain she knew that is not the way it would be in my house if we were married. I explained to her what I expected and made sure she fully understood before we were married. I believe many women use oral sex as a way to manipulate men and I wanted to be very clear that I would be taking her mouth whenever I wanted it. To make sure there was never any question, when I began her oral training I would say “get on your knees and open your mouth”. I would then wait a moment looking at her with her mouth open so it would be very clear I was in control of the situation. I would enter her mouth when I was ready and I would remove myself when I was ready. This is still the way I handle her whenever I take her mouth. I also always have my hand on the back of her neck or the top of her head to make certain she knows I’m in charge. It also makes it easier for me to take her throat when I want. However, when we are making love she will often go down on me for foreplay and I let her take me in her mouth then. She is very submissive and responsive to me sexually. With all the trouble she gives me that is at least one area where I have no issue with her. But outside of lovemaking she knows her mouth belongs to me and I will take it whenever I like! Which is quite often!

    1. Thanks for your description, Rick. I can see why you do that. It’s a good idea in any marriage to make sure the wife can respond sexually when you tell her, including with her mouth. A husband should train his wife with this until she does so easily and well. There should not be resistance.

      I don’t find it necessary to do so forcefully the entire time, but I will make sure she receives it forcefully at least part of the time. That way I can rest, and I can enjoy her doing what she does very well. She still needs to continually respond to me, as I tell her what I want her to do with her mouth, or hands. She is following my lead.

      Many women do manipulate with sex, whether with their mouth or their body. That has got to disappear completely in marriage. A wife belongs to her husband and may not withhold what belongs to him.

      Oral training, and sexual training in general, is very helpful to a woman in learning to submit.

      1. rickmorganhoh Avatar

        I was more like you are with my 1st wife she was very easy compared to Margret. She is a completely different type of woman not one you can let up on. Backing off with her typically opens the door for acting out. Unfortunately, I’m afraid that’s exactly why I’m having attitude issues with her right now. I thought we’d gotten into a good rhythm and I may have given her a little to much rope. Now I’m back at the beginning with her in a few areas. Enjoying the site and your feedback as well as that from your other HOH readers.

  34. Thanks so much for this post. My wife has started her oral training and despite some resistance is learning to accept the new normal. I am amazed at the change of attitude and positives it has brought.

    I am using various suggestions from this site. I have set some goals for her to achieve over the coming months and look forward to seeing her achieving these.

    1. The goals are

      firstly accepting the training and improving softness and removing resistance.
      Secondly, full acceptance of the new normal, including random and regular availability for service.
      Thirdly, swallowing and deep penetration.
      Fourthly, improving technique, responsiveness and enthusiasm.
      Lastly, performance in various new places or environments.

      [comment edited by Aron]

      1. talltaurus Avatar

        Those are good goals. Have you been married long? I had my wife sign and agree to written rules such as those associated with her oral training. Both agreeing to how it would now be that way and in her actual performance, have humbled her and taken away previous attitudes. A woman’s perception of giving head and actually learning how her man wants it done are two different things. As some wives have mentioned on here, learning to swallow semen and deep throat are two phases. Be patient but she may need some discipline sometimes as I found my required effort and her enthusiasm will improve as my strap comes out.
        Would like to hear how you progress with her on her training.

      2. mister504 Avatar

        @talltaurus feel free to contact me on mister504@yahoo.com for updates.

      3. This is a sick thing, recent study shows BJ causes cancer.

        1. Oral sex is not sick, but is normal to sexual enjoyment in marriage. There are recent studies which show a lot of things, and often in five or ten years, studies show something very different. If there is a very minor risk to oral sex, I do not consider it something to strictly avoid, since we live with very minor risk as a part of ordinary and good activities. We have very minor risk every time we get in a car, and even go for a walk. We take very minor risks all the time as part of our jobs. Considering that sexual enjoyment is a natural part of marriage, and draws a couple closer together, there is nothing wrong with accepting such a small risk as part of our regular intimacy. Intimacy is an important part of married life.

      4. Cresta Avatar

        Well, oral sex has both health risks and health advantages…. And each couple needs to know what side of that they’re on. If a man had sexual interaction before marrying the woman he is with, there is a possibility he could have been infected with human papilloma virus (HPV). It is not oral sex that causes cancer, it is oral sex with someone who has been infected with HPV that carries the risk for mouth and throat and neck cancers. If a woman has not been infected I believe it was for her to be vaccinated before having oral sex with a man who has been promiscuous in his past even a little bit… But of course vaccination is now a controversial topic. Still I went and got vaccinated before I got married because my husband was not a virgin when he married me.

        On the other hand, the benefits of oral sex is that it shows some reduction in preeclampsia if a woman is pregnant with that man’s offspring. So actually oral sex could save her life and she would never know it.

        So there are both pros and cons here.

        1. Thanks for sharing your insights. I did not know about possible health benefits. Are you sure you meant to reply to that comment and not the other one about health?

      5. Cresta Avatar

        No, meant it here as a reply to “Qs” saying BJ causes cancer.

    2. You’re welcome. It will definitely help her along in learning to follow her man. I would not use it all the time though. Swallowing can be learned quickly, but it will take some time for her to learn to take it deep, as this requires repeated practice. Many women learn to love oral service, even if there is initial discomfort. She will feel at home in pleasing you.

      1. It really is noticeable how her attitude has changed for the better after a couple weeks of regular kneeling before me. She had become a bit sarcastic and snippy and that has vanished.

        I am continuing the training weekly for now but the might change depending on her progress.

      2. mister504 Avatar

        The improvement in her attitude and respect has been very good, even after only a couple of weeks of kneeling and serving.

        She was getting quite sarcastic and snippy, quite disrespectful even in front of the kids and the new training has changed that.

    3. For us, there is nothing more satisfying and pleasurable for husband and wife than the man taking his wife in the mouth. I needed training to find exactly what I needed to do to give the most enjoyment, but none of it was very difficult. I have read that men taste different and that it can be affected by what they eat, but my husband’s seed doesn’t taste unpleasant in the slightest and I don’t notice any difference whatever he eats. Swallowing is easy and I would never consider not swallowing. That would be disrespectful

      I did needed practice to receive him fully into my throat, but it didn’t really take very long. I know men vary in size and I don’t have experience with others, but I don’t think my husband is any smaller than most.

      As for when and where to do it. Well, when he wants to. Lots of places, but we are discreet.

      I think it is best to give your wife clear instructions on what she needs to do to meet your needs fully. So long as you love each other and you are kind as well as firm, I am sure you will both be pleased with the results. Hopefully, it won’t take months.

      1. mister504 Avatar

        I agree that some practice, kindness and firmness will produce results.

        I think with some patience I will soon be enjoying the full benefits of my wife’s new attitude and willingness. At the moment there is still some reluctance, but as training progresses so this is reducing. I would like to move to a point where resistance and reluctance is a thing of the past.

        She has complained in the past about my size but I don’t think this is an insurmountable hurdle.

  35. Oral-less Avatar

    Hi Aron,
    We are all adults here and the subject matter is not often discussed among Christians, but since you opened the topic I wanted to anonymously extend the conversation a bit as embarrassing as it is to do so even somewhat anonymously.

    I know you have heard from some readers who have moral objections to oral. Several Christian traditions have longstanding issues with the practice. My husband and I don’t have any of those convictions, but I wanted to share with you the difficulties that exist for our marriage for oral, and as I’m writing this anonymously, I will share a lot of details to underscore the variety of specific issues people can encounter with oral.

    Many people unfortunately are promiscuous during some season of their life, I know it seems from your stories that you may have met the Lord and committed your life to Christ sometime after a season of promiscuity. For some people, their sin and lawlessness results in contracting STD’s. Other people are innocent of wrongdoing but contract lifelong STDs in ways that are not their fault at all, and without further explanation, this is my husband’s situation.

    My husband is careful to protect me from also getting that STD. He takes medication but also follows medical advice to use condoms in most situations. This is unfortunately not rare, a rather large percentage of just the US population has various STDs of varying degrees of difficulty, and so many of your readers may also be dealing with something similar.

    As he doesn’t want me getting the STD on my face or in my mouth or throat so, even if we do oral, we do so with condoms, but again, we do so rarely. (And it is almost impossible to find condoms not covered in weird chemicals, such as spermicides, or lubricants, that aren’t really good to have in one’s mouth, so this presents its own issues).

    But additionally, aside from the STD issue, my husband has a medical condition that makes erectile dysfunction a very real difficulty in our lives as well. About 1 in 5 men in the USA at some point in their lives will struggle with this. Erectile dysfunction (ED) creates its own emotional ripples as both a husband and a wife as both can end up struggling with feelings of inadequacy; as for the man it is a shot to his manhood in a sense in that he cannot do sexually as easily what he once could do nor dominate her sexually as easily as he wants to, and for the wife it can make her feel she is not attractive enough, obedient enough, enticing enough, desired enough. For some people, erectile dysfunction comes as a result of sin, as a man who is used to looking at porn may struggle with becoming erect for his wife.

    But there are many other very innocent causes of ED that have nothing to do with sin on anyone’s part or anyone’s failure to entice, that are the result of truly physical causes, even simply from normal aging. In my husband’s case, he has some nerve damage from surgery for prostate cancer. Well-known medication such as Viagra can have serious side effects; in his case it leaves him with an intense migraine headache that lasts for hours and is seriously dehabilitating. So he prefers not to use that. Instead the urologist prescribed injections that are very effective, but which can’t be used more than once in a 48 hour period. What this means however, is that he has difficulty getting and keeping an erection on his own, and if he has to rely on the medication, he only gets to have an erection every few days.

    Throw all this together, and my husband is just not all that interested in having oral sex. He prefers to with our one chance every few days (as busy-ness and fatigue also limit the amount of opportunities we have,) to have the more uniting type of sex, and this isn’t by my insistence or urging.

    At any rate, all this to say — throughout your blog you put a huge emphasis on a wife learning to submit sexually via oral sex. Do you feel a wife can’t become who she needs to be without this in her marriage? Is consistent physical discipline or other types of sexual demands not adequate for what a wife needs to learn? I am just asking as the obstacles that we face and my husband’s personal preference cannot be entirely uncommon; perhaps they are uncommon to be all together in one package, but individually, struggles caused by STDs or by erectile dysfunction that get in the way of oral sex being ideal for a couple are probably not entirely unique to us (as well as the moral issues that some Christians hold towards oral in general.)

    I keep running into folks both here and elsewhere online though that to varying degrees seem to insist that oral sex is a necessity to a wife truly learning to love and submit to her husband, enough that I’m starting to honestly get a complex about it — and it’s not even my choice. He can have all the oral sex he wants from me, he just doesn’t want it. In fact he seems rather to want for oral to go the OTHER way, to be honest, and to me it takes a lot of submission and vulnerability for things to go in THAT direction as well, but that version of oral is never mentioned as any sort of submissive training anywhere.

    Anyway, please forgive the long missive, but I as this is all real life and real to our marriage, I thought it worth submitting it into this conversation.

    1. Hello, Thanks for your letter. That’s a situation a lot of people don’t think about regarding sex, or sexual submission. There are both men and women struggling with either illnesses or debilities which regularly get in the way of their ability to have intimacy. In cases like that you simply have to accommodate, and make the adjustments you must make. Sometimes sadly that means less intimacy.

      I don’t believe that sexual training is absolutely necessary for a wife to learn submission, as there are other tools to teach it. It is simply that it helps for many women. If she is unable to please him with her mouth, she shows her submission through her words, obedience, and any other intimacy he desires of her.

      Regarding the pleasure going the other way, I DO mention a husband bringing his wife pleasure as a way to show his command over her in my article Sex as Dominance. I believe I mention it in passing elsewhere. A man’s command over his wife’s body, and ability to bring her to heights of pleasure, is one avenue in which she learns her belonging to her man, and the control he has over her. It’s not all about throwing her on the bad, smacking her butt, and taking her like a beast.

      While a man pleasuring his wife sexually does not offer the same experience as her doing the same, it can still play a role in breaking down any resistance in her. It can still leave her feeling her belonging to him more deeply. He knows her every fold, explores her in and out, and does as he wills with her body. Some women do respond with a deep desire to serve their man.

      I hope that helps offer some insight.

  36. And as luck would have it, my husband wanted to know what I was reading, and then wanted to read himself. Yes, he has oral when he wants it, but no, he has not been ‘at least a couple on inches’ into my throat, which is a lot! Now he is very interested and we shall practice. Except I do not find any info as to how the man is to control himself. I agree with him in that it will be trial and error, and he cannot tell me how it will go until he gets into my throat. So, if he goes up and down in my throat to use the sides and moisture to pleasure him, how do I know he will not climax too early and choke me? Please do not say I must trust him, because he does not know himself. He is very fond of his member in my mouth, which seems to be common with men here, but neither of us wants me to choke. Could men please explain how it feels for a man, and at which stage to pull back and climax in the woman’s mouth, to make sure she will not choke? Thank you.

    1. aronhusband Avatar

      Hello Rosa, Thank you for your question. Men usually know when they are going to climax, so they can make sure not to do it too deeply, and possibly choke her. Women often can tell too, once they have spend enough time with their man in bed, and experienced his climax before. They can notice changes in the second or so before climax. However, that may not be true of everyone. If men are already deeply into her throat before they climax, it will be deep enough not to choke her anyway, assuming she is adapted to having him that deep. I hope it goes very well for both of you.

  37. No way my parents would have talked to me about how to best please my husband through oral. I certainly would have helped to know more about what was to be expected of me but my parents were very much about making me a strong independent Woman and not one who wanted to be a man’s property.

    My first taste ( pardon the pun ) was on wedding night husband commanded me to strip which was quite hard as my wedding dress had a corset body and wasn’t designed to be undone by the bride.

    Luckily I hadn’t ruined the moment and was able to respond to his command of get on your knees and ope your mouth. It is really quite scary first time to see a hard erect penis enter your mouth and you’re responsible for pleasing your husband for first time. He did give commands to say you will swallow every last drop and I will only withdraw when I’m comfortable to do so.

    1. Thank you for sharing your experience. It is good for a wife to know that oral is an expected part of pleasing her husband. But even if she does not know beforehand, she will learn without too much trouble. It is a joy for husband and wife to discover each other physically, and learn to please the other. I believe most couples make love on their wedding night, although oral may play a role in it.

    2. talltaurus Avatar

      Flyer, thanks for sharing. In today’s society there are most likely not many parents/mothers teaching their daughters the expectation of performing oral on their wedding night. This is the husbands duty and it sounds like yours made it clear what he wanted you to do. Some new brides need discipline to do it properly. It’s great you swallowed.

      1. Beloved Avatar

        I don’t understand. The wedding night is a time for tenderness, kindness. Most virgin brides are terrified, why would a husband want to play into that terror instead of taking his bride with gentleness and showing her the beauty of bringing her into the joy of their love together? Is the covenant not about mutual joy? Is the wedding night really a time for sternness, for one-sided demonstrations of who is in charge?
        And why on earth would it matter if she swallowed?
        My husband disciplines me when I’ve done wrong, but he also wants me to enjoy our bed together.

  38. Hey, I’ve been reading this blog and taking notes for a few weeks now. The dizzying number of comments and their variety regarding oral sex, made me decide to leave a comment for the first time. I am 25 years old, my husband is more than a decade older than me. We have oral sex without a condom, as often as my husband feels like it (I often ask him to do it myself). A normal healthy man, who regularly takes care of his intimate hygiene (which is very easy with men), is a faithful husband – there is no chance of anything going wrong here. As for my feelings as a woman and wife – I love to satisfy my husband in this way, and I have spent a lot of time finding and learning ways to perfect it (even though my husband didn’t require it of me, and I remember that I embarrassed him the first time I did it to the end – I just happened to be menstruating). I always do it to the end (unless it’s just an interlude during normal sex, which is also a great feeling) and I love it when he finishes in my mouth. It gives me great pleasure. I feel that this is how I can show him how I love and adore him. Is this shallow? I refer unbelievers to the Song of Songs. Does this make me a glorified prostitute? Again – the Song of Songs and the very sanctity of marriage – it is prostitution and adultery that are corrupted, they are a travesty of marital unity and sex, not marital sex! The biggest paradox is that liberated feminists do not allow themselves to be subservient to their husbands, they skimp on sex – while followers of the same idea cheat, conduct affairs, disrespect their bodies on the street and on the Internet, take part in various sexual perversions – no difference whether for free or for money – although, as the film about luxury prostitutes for money shows, they are able to do anything. And they shame and harass traditional wives and marital sex…. Hey! This is your husband! These are your safest arms on earth, this is your happiness, this is your greatest love – I would love to make heaven for him!

    1. Those are some really good points, Adria. Thank you. I appreciate your desire to satisfy your husband. It is one thing that makes marriage glorious.

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