Punished on Her Back

The average use punishment seems to include positions which face a wife down, and place her bottom up, making an easy presentation of it to her husband. She goes over his lap, or bends over. She is facing away, or downward. Only her back and the soft target of her bottom are before his eyes. Less commonly, a position on her back is used, one which completely reverses the order, and gives him a look at his wife from the front, while equally presenting her bottom to spank. The common term for this is diaper position, since it mimics the position a baby takes in having his diaper changed. The wife is on her back, lifting her legs up, and taking her knees up to her belly, or her legs stretch up even further. From those who use it, they favor it above other positions for a variety of reasons.

While any spanking position includes vulnerability, as it does nakedness, a position on her back can seem more vulnerable still. The man can gaze at her body, easily seeing her face, her breasts, and her sex. She shows to him the gentle parts of her that do not get spanked, along with the bottom which does. Her sex, being visible and open, presents a further vulnerability, as he is delivering strokes so near to its tenderness, she can feel the vibrations there. He can further easily touch it should he desire, leaving nothing out of bounds of her discipline. That vulnerability comes with an extra touch of fear, fear at her soft spots being struck, and fear of her husband seeing her pain and humbled expression on her face. The sight of the rod or the strap in his hand adds to this, as she is not turned away, but must see as he prepares his strokes, and brings them down on her waiting backside. He is in control. She is helpless. 

The sight of her face itself adds to the vulnerability, as well as to the connection between them. It can aid the communication, and the verbal lesson given, as the man is free to look her in the eye with ease, and she must look at him. The wife who is bent over, can in a sense shed her tears more privately, and cry out in her own little space. But positioned on her back, her tears and cries are in the light, before her husband. She knows each cry of release, and each word of sorrow are directed right to him, and he sees her being humbled more intimately this way. He watches each moment as her pride breaks down, and she professes submission. He sees her wince, and grit her teeth. Should she plead with him, this is face to face. He looks her in the eye as he tells her — You are my woman and you better learn your lesson. That butt belongs to me. She communicates her sorrow and her submission to his face, pouring out her heart to him — I was wrong. I won’t do it again. I’m sorry. I’ll be good next time. Please. The lecture, and the intimate back and forth, being face to face allow them to commune deeply. There is nothing to be hidden. All is in the light.

An added characteristic of this back position is that it can accentuate the pain of a spanking. The muscles being stretched out more, and the skin being stretched out more, leave less of a shield against the stinging blows. The bottom and thighs are more sensitive. Pain seems to increase and the heat reach more deeply than in other spankings. Marks are left more easily on the skin. If her legs are open more than a little, as well as raised, the inside of the thighs are presented as easy points to leave burning stripes, inviting more of a blistering than usual. All of her sensitive spots are open.

Men and women both testify this position can be at times more effective than others. Many couples never use it. Others make it their norm. There may be some variety in how a wife is placed, or precisely how her legs are bent, or her knees rest, but it does not make great difference. Despite the vulnerability a wife feels, she still participates in her correction, lifting up, or holding tight to her legs. She is making that helplessness her own. The woman on her back watches the strokes come down, seeing when and where each one will arrive. She sees her man raise back his arm, swing it down, and the instrument land and lash at her flesh. She continues to offer herself up in the most intimate way every second she watches her chastisement. 

One note for safety in giving the spanking is that a man take special care not to strike her sex, or her tailbone. He should use an instrument he is very able to finely control. The woman also needs some self-control, because if she squirms, that may result in kicking. Not only does kicking get her out of position, but she could accidentally strike her husband. She will need extra care to maintain position, and it may help for her to hold onto her own legs tightly. While the woman is being disciplined, the man is also trusting in her to hold her position. 

I don’t give positions a great deal of weight in giving an effective spanking. However, the choice of one position over another can still be advantageous, and it will also affect what instrument is best used. Some positions come across as forging a more personal bond, and others seem more formal. The position on her back, with everything in full view, face to face, seems by nature most intense, nurturing her vulnerability and helplessness. It can aid in the communication of words and sentiments, so necessary to that bond. A wife provides her most personal side to her man, not her back. His chastisement then reaches her deepest person.


35 responses to “Punished on Her Back”

  1. Wendy Avatar

    Oh Aron
    No no no I was just recently spanked in that position I am not a fan super embarrassing just giving you my spanked opinion it was awful thank you for listening

    1. Thank you for sharing your experience. It does not sound like a pleasant position to be punished in at all.

      1. Wendy Avatar

        No it is not ❤️ But it surely worked have not come home late since

    2. johnsonjelena45 Avatar

      I hated to be spanked in the diaper position- I hated to see the spank on the way to my bottom. I was very hard to me to stay in this position. I was most often spanked over his knee so he had good control of me. Anne, Wendy or any other ladies – I love messages exchanges johnsonjelena45@gmail.com (No men please)

  2. I hate this position! My husband’s favorite way to spank me is first to send me to our bedroom tell me to get ready. I have to get the hairbrush paddle and wait on my back holding the small paddle and my legs up and spread. I wish I could close my legs and talk to him during the beginning of the lecture but no. I have to stay in position while I try to explain myself and what I was thinking when I misbehaved. Then he keeps lecturing me while paddling me, and I have to look into his eyes the whole time. If I look away, close my eyes, or move too much I get a hard swat to each thigh.

    You’d think he wouldn’t have to spank me much but my average is once every ten days. It’s my fault because I’m lazy, and my husband is orthodox and wants me to follow a lot of rules that I hate. I knew this when I married him, but sometimes I get annoyed and argue with him which is stupid and I’m just making life harder for myself. Last time I got spanked was a couple weeks ago for touching myself.

    1. Amelia Avatar

      That sounds like quite a harsh discipline routine…

  3. This website just makes me incredibly sad. The diaper position is one of the hardest in BDSM with a high risk of injury. But those involved do it voluntarily. I am a sensitive and gentle woman. How did we deserve to be in so much pain, to be so ashamed, to be so broken?

    1. Hello JL, Those involved in marital spanking are in a consensual relationship as well. Marital spanking is generally safer than bdsm, because it lacks some of the extremes of punishment, and also because it is in the loving and lifelong union of marriage, rather than what is often a fabricated relationship in bdsm. Naturally, any spanking might be dangerous if done wrongly, which is why I make a point to write about safety, whether in this position or otherwise. It is a legitimate concern.

      A woman who is sensitive and gentle sometimes deserves punishment too. If she disobeys her husband, or does something harmful, she has earned it. Being sensitive and gentle might aid her in learning from the spanking, and in being better behaved in the future, so perhaps in the long run, she won’t be spanked very often. However, being gentle in character does not get her off the hook for bad behavior.

      If wife spanking makes you sad, I can assure you that you don’t see the entire picture. That picture includes the great peace and harmony which discipline brings to marriage, as well as the daily love between man and wife. It includes the destructive habits which are left in the past because a wife had to take a few short trips over her husband’s knee. Spanking is a small part of any marriage, and is only used when earned.

      1. Hello Aron,

        I have no problem with simple wife spanking, if it is consensual and I also understand that many women need it for themselves. What I find bad is all the other derogatory things mentioned in the articles and comments, such as mouth soaping, caning, face slapping, social media restrictions, forced nudity for extended periods (possibly another cold house), even more severe punishment if the woman does not stay in position during the spanking.

        The sex articles sound to me like a man can take a woman anytime and with any hardness, whether it’s comfortable for her or not. But I can also be wrong, I have problems with the translation, English is not my mother tongue and in German some words have multiple meanings.

        I couldn’t live with a man who would do this to me, but luckily I don’t have to. I have a smart and wise husband, who I respect very much and who works hard to provide a good life for his family. We live in peace and harmony and have well behaved hardworking children. If I do something wrong and that doesn’t happen often, he finds strict and clear words and that’s enough to improve my behavior in the long term.

        But your writing style is really very good, I have to say appreciatively, better than in some books. However, we will never agree. I wish you and your family all the best.

        1. Hello JL, Thank you very much. I’m glad you can see there is some value in spanking. If it weren’t a useful tool to many couples, it wouldn’t be used as often as it is.

          There is nothing odd or harsh about a man being able to enjoy his wife’s body when he desires. It is natural to marriage, in which two bodies become one. Bodies are shared property, and that mutual enjoyment is a part of the bliss of marriage. Contrary to popular belief, that is not only for the man’s enjoyment, but a wife can find satisfaction in it as well.

          Sharing her body with her husband when he desires is not too hard for a woman, and many women find no problem in fulfilling it as a responsibility. They are happy to keep their husband satisfied, and honored that they are the woman to do it. They may not always feel like it in the moment, but there are far more important things than how we feel in the moment, and often, in fulfilling those responsibilities when they appear inconvenient, we find they are easier than expected, and there is enjoyment in them anyway. Many women find pleasure in satisfying their husbands, even when they are simply pleasuring him.

          Enjoying each other’s bodies freely is far better than being refused sex, often repeatedly. It’s better than the coldness, and resentment that can built if sex is treated like a treat to give when deserved, or a punishment to withhold when you are upset. It is better than the barrier that can build up when husband and wife are not close together, and it’s better than having to beg or cajole just to get sex. Plus, in being taken by her man, a woman can grow deeply in her submission, because her sexual softness accentuates her soft character and yielding to her husband. It is ultimately good for her as well.

          I am happy you have a good marriage, and that you try to respect your husband’s authority. No law says that every marriage needs spanking to function, and there are couples in which other forms of correction are effective. In my experience, spanking is the best way, for its effectiveness, speed, and practicality. It also functions both to punish bad behavior, and deepen a woman’s submission, something other punishments generally don’t tackle together. However, if you are a responsible and submissive wife without it, that’s wonderful. I’m sure you have a very good husband as well.

          Take care.

      2. Hello Aron,
        I would like to clarify that as I think you misunderstood me. I agree with you that regular sex is incredibly important in marriage and that it brings husband and wife even closer together. No partner should be withheld or used as a means of pressure. I also believe that the lack of sex is what causes marriages to break up.
        I’m all about the sex technique. I also enjoy male power in bed, dominance and some playful smacks. I like to spoil my husband. But if she’s in pain while taking, they should be allowed to say so and he should respond. Also I think it’s nice when a man sometimes asks a woman what she wants in bed.
        My husband does it and he enjoys making me happy in the marriage bed.
        And yes I have a very good husband and I love him very much.

        1. I see. Thank you for explaining. I do agree, a man should care about his wife’s pleasure in bed as well.

      3. I really believe that husbands should punish wives regularly, no misbehaviour should go unchecked, and no infarction is too small. Consistency is so very important. Spanking also brings the point home and leaves no confusion as to who is in charge. Women do have a lot of habits they can get into if remained unchecked, they need an authoritative figure to answer to, and the husband is definitely in that position. What do I do if my husband expects my complete submission and ultimate respect, but isn’t interested in punishing for misbehaviour? I’m trying so hard to submit but it challenges the way our almost tao decade marriage has been and the way I was educated. I fall short and need his guidance and have asked for it. But I don’t receive it.

        1. aronhusband Avatar

          Hello Sara, If you have already asked for your husband to discipline you, and he does not want to, then you learn to submit without that discipline. Learn respect and obedience apart from punishment. Discipline may help, but it is not absolutely necessary in every case. Treat your husband like your king.

  4. Monica Avatar

    I have always been punished in the traditional position, on all fours, hips high. But I am facing a mirror, so my husband can see my face and I can see him and the belt coming down.

    1. Thank you for your comment. That’s an interesting way to make the position more personal. I believe there is benefit in being able to see the face.

    2. johnsonjelena45 Avatar

      I hated facing a mirror, I hated to see a spank on the way to my bottom. He knew I hated that so it was sometimes extra punishment for me to be spanked in front of mirror.

    3. Darcy NH Avatar
      Darcy NH

      Blessing’s to you Monica my husband has also used spanking in front of a mirror to drive an extra point home. There is something much more deeply humbling about having to see my own facial expressions and tears running down my cheeks. I always realize much more quickly how I deserve the punishment I’m getting!

  5. Just for kicks, I tried to get myself in this position. I achieved the desired form, but I’ve been nursing a strained lower back muscle since. I’ve had to laugh at myself and #matureladyprobs. I have not shared the injury nor the contortion with anyone at home LOL Hope I heal quickly!!!! Anyone else have a similar silly story?!?

    1. nicolelinn45 Avatar

      Hello Demhi. As another #matureladyprobs, I find that certain positions are a bit more challenging now. Sometimes the back and hips say….”woman are you crazy!”.

  6. Sweetcheeks Avatar

    Hi guys, I thought I would chime in as we used this position for a maintenance spanking this week having read about it here on the blog! As we were due a maintenance session I let my husband know about this post and he agreed to try a new position (usually I go over his knee and hand spanked for maintenance)

    He said he likes to be able to see my face and body and would definitely try it again. He said over the knee is still his preference but he would not discount being able to see my sex, breasts and face and being able to mix it up

    We also made love immediately after the spanking so it is good for a bonding and intimacy position

  7. Do you use it?

    1. Are you asking if I have my wife in this position when I punish her? If so, no I do not. I don’t have too much interest in it, despite its unique advantages.

  8. Sautara Avatar

    Everyone is telling me to get a post secondary education so I can have a better income later but I’m not interested at going to school because I have traditional values meaning I want to stay home take care of the home and my kids, be 100% available for my husband when he needs me since I will belong to him and let my husband be the money maker I feel like if I have a high education my respect for my futur husband will decrease and I will be at work all the time what do you think I should do I need your help. I’m also very religious do you think a women going to work goes against God’s image for real marriage?

    1. Hello Sautara, Thank you for your question. I appreciate your desire to be a godly wife and to serve your husband. The New Testament teaches very clearly that the wife is to care for the home, so that is her role and the will of God. It is also clearly advantageous because of the incredible value of being a homemaker, and the way in which home life and nurture of children fits a woman’s gentler nature.

      I believe in general that a pursuit of higher education is very bad for marriage. It inspires many women to look down on men, and take on an independent spirit. That is what will generally be inculcated into her though the environment and the teaching as well. There definitely is a strong link between higher education in women and divorce. Both school life and career life also become a ripe environment for fornication and adultery. The woman has better things to do than follow the man’s path in life.

      1. Sautara Avatar

        Thank you so much for your answer, I’m glad to hear that’s it’s the will of God, but it can be hard to hear your mom say that it’s her dream to have all of her kids get a post secondary education because it ‘’honors’’ her the Bible also say honor your mother and Father will I be going against the will of God for not ‘’honoring my parents or I’m honoring God for following his rules about being a Godly wife and not get a post secondary education to avoid looking down on my husband .

        1. Thank you for your reply. Yes, we have to honor God before men. Preparing yourself for marriage, rather than pursuing higher education, is to honor God. I know you will bless all of the community through your marriage and home.

    2. Sautara Avatar

      Can you specify what you mean by ‘’you will bless all of the community through your marriage and home.’’ Please Thank you

      1. A good stable marriage, and the children raised up in the home, bless the world into the future. Family is naturally the fabric of society. Faith, virtue, and life is passed down that way, and it brings much peace.

  9. I like the extra connection and vulnerability that this position provides. The lecture gets into my head more. My husband just uses his hand so I feel it’s safe enough.

  10. How do we handle visits to the doctor shortly after a spanking? I had to be seen for some pelvic pain and found myself undressed from the waist down. I hadn’t had a recent spanking but I’d I did there likely would still be some redness and bruising.I just don’t want to find myself overly questioned about our lifestyle.

    1. Hello Ally, Thank you for your question. That is a common concern. I make an effort to avoid giving a spanking if there is a doctor’s visit coming up. It has never been a problem so far.

      However, some people actually talk to their doctors about the fact that they receive discipline, and let them know it is consensual. That way there’s never a worry about the doctor being surprised by it in the future.

      Some doctors are quite accepting of the fact that couples use discipline.

  11. My Husband never chooses not to discipline me because of doctor visits.

    If I need a spanking before a doctor’s appointment, I know I’ll get it, and if the doctor questions the marks that discipline leaves behind, I must answer that: “I am a disciplined wife, and when I behave inappropriately for a Christian wife, I get a spanking from my husband to get back on the right track”

    [edited for grammar by Aron]

    1. johnsonjelena45 Avatar

      Ninna, I am very proud of your words. Not that it would matter but do you have a male or female Gynecologist. I once when to my primary Doctor, the day after a bad spanking with a bad tummy pain. He put me in the hospital with a bad UTI, I was lucky that the Doctor or nor any one at the hospital saw my bottom. I assume you have been lucky too?

  12. We use diaper position occasionally, but not often. For us it is more of a warm up position if I am being chastised at the beginning of a spanking. As much as I hate to admit it, I respond well to humiliation for certain infractions and I do find it humiliating to hug my knees to my chest while getting a hand spanking or the riding crop on my cheeks and thighs. I always feel a (temporary) sense of relief when my husband finally tells me to turn over onto my knees and the harder part of the spanking begins.

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