Welcome and Learning Discipline

Welcome. This is a website devoted to teaching marital discipline, or wife spanking as some call it. I hope to provide advice, instructions, and knowledge about how to use spanking in your marriage relationship. I will draw from personal experience and many years of using discipline in the home, but it is not a personal blog. I have no ability to write about daily occurrences as most bloggers do. This is an instructional page and will be full of essays and other material to help you learn about marital discipline. While I aim this website for the sincerely curious or the new beginner, I think those already experienced with discipline will at least find it interesting, and perhaps get a few unique angles or insights that wouldn’t elsewhere. I also offer to tutor men and women who are beginning to use discipline, if they are married, or soon to be so. You can contact me for advice or instructions in it and I will do my best to help you.

What is commonly called domestic discipline today is just a modern term for what has been done for thousands of years: correcting and disciplining a wife by spanking her. It is an excellent way of running the home, and is helpful in maintaining the leadership of the man, and the gentle submission of his wife. It also lovingly corrects her, and brings her back under the husband’s wing when she slipping off that path. Often a good talking to, and a spanking, does her immense good in her heart and behavior.  Millions know this already, but most are afraid to say it. Spanking is good for a wife and for a marriage.

I talk about how to introduce discipline into your marriage, and to your partner. What the benefits of wife spanking are. How to deliver a spanking safely and effectively. Why spankings are often desirable to men and women. And much more. While I share my own advice and experiences which I think will help you learn, I also share some of what other disciplinarians do, to express more broadly how things might work with discipline in your home. There is legitimately some variety within marital discipline, and I don’t claim my way is always the only way. I have learned much from discussion with other spanking husbands, and from articles online. I absorb that, process it, and share it with you.

This discussion of discipline is also Christian in its orientation, as this represents my faith and values. That greatly affects how I view marriage, and the role of the man’s headship and guidance of his wife, among many other things. However, the mechanics of discipline, its tools, and much human emotion and psychology is virtually universal, so I expect that the non-Christian can learn much about discipline from these pages. If you do not like to hear about God, or Jesus Christ, or a belief system you strongly disagree with, you will likely desire to leave quickly. Not that I want you to go. I want you to stay and benefit from it all. I am just notifying you. This website is for others to learn from and comes from my heart, mind, and life experience.

A lot of people assume if you bring up spanking between men and women, that you mean some kind of kinky thing that occurs in bed. It is a natural assumption. I don’t fault people for making it. However, I write here on spanking as a form of discipline, to better a wife’s attitude, and correct wrongs. That is what I am experienced with and also what I have learned from other practitioners. That’s not to say there is no erotic element in marital spanking, as for most of us there is. Clearly intimacy brilliantly expresses male power and female yielding, and parallel to this, a strong expression of authority – not just baring a woman’s butt and spanking her – carries with it a sexual element. What men and women do in bed certainly is linked with power and those under control. That’s why I will touch on the subject in these essays, although I don’t deal with it commonly. Authority and submission are naturally exciting.

Yet discipline is not there for the thrill of a spanking. Nor is it there because you don’t like what someone did or they upset you. It is useful tool in the strong, loving leadership of the man of the home. The husband is the head and is responsible for his wife under him; for providing for her needs, her protection, her growth in faith, and her virtue and holiness. In fact, he is also responsible for the running of the whole household, including the house, property, and upbringing the children. His wife might have her own individual projects she does, but he is the overseer of it. He has the right and responsibility to discipline his wife, and correct her. She might be defiant, show him disrespect, neglect her responsibilities with the children, fall into being vulgar or immodest, or any other destructive wrong. The man corrects her as her head, and may use corporal punishment if he chooses. Many find it helpful and effective. Others do not. Either way, an order of leadership, and a system of discipline, requires that a husband can punish his wife for her wrongs.

I have a peaceful and contended marriage. My wife and I are close and have been very happy together for many years. I do not get disrespect from her. I do not see her fall into using a bad mouth or dressing like a whore. I do not spend time in argument with her, and I can count on one hand the number of times we have yelled at each other over many years together. I really can’t even bring one to mind right now. She clearly knows I am the head of the home, and she clearly submits to my authority. I also take my role seriously, and I lay down rules for her and the household in general, which seek to make it a godly and fruitful home. On the rare occasion I need to spank my wife, she learns her lesson quickly, and she does her best not to repeat it. If she is neglectful in her duties, she knows I will give her a lesson over my knee. On the rare instances she shows disrespect – and she usually knows better – she gets spanked hard and will be sore the next day. A woman must not disrespect her husband. I’m not saying spanking is the only reason for the sweet peace that we enjoy, or the fact we work so smoothly together. Much of that is rooted in following the Word of God, and applying it in common sense ways to our marriage. However, having a system of correction helps immensely. Spanking is a useful tool and not once in many years have I regretted bringing it into our marriage. It puts out fires quickly, and keeps my wife soft and submissive.

A common cultural conception today — and I will write more on this subject later — is that spanking your wife is cruel and inhumane. This is why most websites such as these are anonymous. Everyone knows many wives get spanked, but there is still a cultural current of demonizing those who do it. But there is nothing inhumane about having a system of correction in your marriage, and using punishment for good. It is what nearly every authority on the planet does. Spanking our wife to lovingly correct her for a wrong is good and caring, even if it hurts in the moment. Even if it causes some tears and a sore bottom.

By comparison, wife spanking is much more humane than ongoing fighting, yelling, coldness, and insults. It is much more humane than divorce, which is a sin, and which the Bible compares to an act of violence and bloodshed. Many who have experienced divorce say it is the worst thing they’ve ever been through, and its negative consequences on children are well documented. Spanking your wife is also more human that firing an employee. A spanking is periodic, and fairly short lived. Getting fired leaves one without an income, incredible daily stress, families with children without what they need, emotional turmoil, and more. Spanking is furthermore incredibly more humane than state discipline, one which involves sending a man in uniform to your door, perhaps smashing it in, legally clubbing you in the head if you resist arrest, dragging you away in chains, and locking you in a cage behind bars. Wife spanking is also much more humane that most prisons, places where a man is separated from his loved ones, from his job, is at high risk of being violently raped repeatedly, in an environment with a suicide rate 7-10 times higher than the national average.

Spanking your wife is a loving form of correction, and quite safe compared to the rest. Those who’ve got a problem with spanking are quite disoriented in their judgment. If you object at all to it, you’ve also got to object much more strongly to everything else I just listed and more. There is great good in this form of discipline. It may not cure cancer or solve world hunger, but it can aid immensely in marital peace and harmony. Just remove the cultural glasses, take a deep breath, and think beyond the way you’ve been programmed.


23 responses to “Welcome and Learning Discipline”

  1. […] want to expand on what I mention in my introduction — why do I use domestic discipline and why do I recommend it to others? Or to drop the […]

  2. […] spanking your wife — their search was the URL of my blog […]

  3. […] online manual is purposed to give guidance and advise about marital spanking. A spanking is one part of a […]

  4. I could not agree with you more! I was disciplined as a child by loving parents. I was rarely spanked, and deserved it when I was. At the same time, I was not raised in a home with a man in charge. My mother was in charge. As a result of that, I am reasonably well self disciplined, while at the same time, very headstrong. My first marriage failed, largely because I was unwilling to respect my husband as the head of the household. It took me years after Our divorce to realize that this was the reason.

    I am determined to not make that same mistake again. I’m now married, more than 10 years, to a man who I respect. He is a strong, kind, and wonderful man. I wish he would take a firmer grip on the reins of leadership, put, and keep me in place. We are working on a DD relationship, but finding our way is a challenge. He doesn’t like to spank me. He says I don’t need it. (I think he is wrong, but am working on having a submissive heart!) I don’t think he realizes just how much of the leader role I play in our marriage. When I catch myself, I step back and deliberately defer to him….it’s definitely a process.

    1. Kate, my husband is the same way; he doesn’t want to hurt me and says I don’t need it. I beg to differ! I know I have bad attitudes and am very critical of him at times. I think our culture has just completely emasculated our men and stripped them of their authority so that they are happy even when we take control so they don’t have to. When I realized the error of my ways, you’d think I could just miraculously do the changing on my own. But I think what the discipline does (the two times he has done it) is that it reprograms my brain and reinforces the truth that we inherently know but fail to live out in daily living. I am a person who would benefit greatly from a daily training sessions but my husband is really against spanking me if I “haven’t done anything wrong.” I pray he can do some changing as well. but until then, I’ll keep trying to live obediently and with reverence towards my man.

  5. This is a great resource – and I very much hope to find a bride who will agree to these principles and study your guide and articles. It’s refreshingly thorough and I’m glad to see it made available.

    1. Thank you very much. I hope to help men and women preparing for marriage, as well as those already married. There are more women who are ready to accept discipline than you’d think. I have a number of articles up on preparing for marriage, and on introducing discipline that may help you. Take care.

  6. […] have the time or funds to put one together. I have seen men and women grow from absorbing this website, and I would be equally honored if men and women came together in marriage through it. I want to […]

  7. […] it reaches across the world. As a man who wants discipline to benefit many more marriages, and to help couples in learning to practice it, I am greatly enthused that it gets a decent readership across the […]

  8. My husband spanks me from the very first day of our marriage. I was spanked by both of my parents regularly and I am pretty okay with that.
    Now he wants to spank me in front of my parents and even in front of his parents.
    I have very mixed feelings about that.
    Should I ask him to spank me over panties?

    1. Hello Maria, Spanking in marriage should be between husband and wife. It is very intimate, and it is only the husband who should be seeing his wife’s body, and seeing her humbled. There is no need to involve others, and it presents its own obstacles in family relationships if you do. He should spank you in private, because you are his wife.

      I have this article addressing this topic: https://spankingyourwife.com/2021/10/08/that-group-thing/

      Take care.

  9. Anonymous Avatar

    “By comparison, wife spanking is much more humane than ongoing fighting, yelling, coldness, and insults”

    This says a lot. I respect my h to lead our home. He has shown his authority from our beginning, and leads our relationship. It’s peaceful. My submission honors him and us. I’d rather be spanked then experience withdrawal any day.

    1. Thank you for your comment. Loving discipline is surely a much better option than the alternatives.

  10. gms1000ae2363a036 Avatar

    My hoh is reluctant to spank me hard.
    though today I was spanked because I wasn’t wearing panties. His rule is no panties all weekend because it is more convenient if he wants to take me. He scolded me this morning and said I was deliberately tempting him when he needed to work.
    Its now evening and I’m worried if he finds me with panties back on at bed time he will spank me again for wearing them!

    1. Hello, That is a bit of a dilemma. I’d just advise being mindful of what your husband wants, and making sure he knows you are doing your best to respect his will. If his instructions to you are contradictory, or impossible to fulfill, just gently explain that, an ask for more clarification. I personally would not spank for something so minor, unless I thought there was real deliberate intention to disobey.

      It can take time for a man to learn to spank hard. There is a natural reluctance to cause injury or pain, and it takes time to learn the correct strength to use, and whether the strokes are too hard or too light. I recommend men learn to give hard and thorough spankings, and a few common sense precautions will make sure they cause no harm. A spanking has got to hurt to punish the wrong, and to be a deterrent.

  11. Lady Ace Avatar
    Lady Ace

    Just signing up for email alerts.

    1. Welcome. I hope you find the material helpful to you.

  12. Colombin. Avatar

    When you announce a spanking is really a bad news for your wife. The spanking must be feared. The day after have to be a day of remorse and a painful one.
    Spanking is a punishment, not a hobby.

  13. I totally agree with your following comment and said similar but people have often asked me where is the proof is? Your comment is: “What is commonly called domestic discipline today is just a modern term for what has been done for thousands of years: correcting and disciplining a wife by spanking her.” That makes sense but have you found actual proof what wives were disciplined by their husband for centuries.

    1. aronhusband Avatar

      Thank you for your comment. Yes, it is very well documented. That is true of our culture and of others. Wife spanking may not be entirely universal, but it is common and ancient.

      1. Sounds like a good idea for an article.

        1. aronhusband Avatar

          Sure. It could be.

  14. Hello I’m a female who is in her mid 50’s. I’m looking for some one to give me a spanking over your knee.

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