What’s the Frequency

It is very common to be asked by those interested in spanking how often I spank. Others ask this too, but it provides the new beginner a picture of what seems normal in the practice, and he can work our what he does better when he’s got an idea in his head. What you’ll find in frequency, as in other areas, is that you can legitimately do things different ways, according to what is best for you.

While I wouldn’t tell anyone how often they need to spank their wives, I would caution against either attitude which learns toward spanking frequently, or very rarely. If a husband must do it all the time, it indicates to me something is wrong, either in needing to micromanage his wife, or in failing to lead her through other methods. Likewise, if a husband let ages pass between sessions, it would raise a red flag to me. For if we are really working on bettering our wife, and setting good standards for our home, there will naturally be some failings we have to deal with from her. Leaving her rarely disciplined can indicate a lack of motivation to lead the home, or a lack of consistency in spanking. Either one is poor.

I mostly make NEED the indicator of how often I spank. I simply respond to how often my wife needs it. To what infractions need to be addressed. Early in our marriage, when there was a learning curve for both of us, I’d say I put her over my knee every two or three weeks. She was just learning how I did things, and despite being sincerely submissive, also learning to drop some poor habits. She had a red tush much more often back then.

After a year or so she started going two or more months without needing to be spanked. She fell into a good routine of taking care of her work, and of listening to my lead, of hearing my words. It still happens that she gets spanked twice in a few weeks, if something has really gone wrong, but that’s rare. If I spank her these days it’s usually for putting off her responsibilities, which occasionally she falls into if she convinces herself my words were just suggestions. I’ve seen her go well over three months without being spanked as well.

As you can see the frequency is not anything I am set on. If my wife needed it more often, I’d give it. If she needed it less often I’d give it. I do believe there is legitimate usage of spankings for training rather than punishment, or for a helpful reminder into the future, but I view those as the exception to the rule and for specialized kind of situations. The rule I use is to respond to need.

For a husband to come to his own sense of norm will take some hands-on experience. It will take time in communicating, and in setting rules in his own home. It will take some judgment calls in when to punish. Over time — perhaps a year or two — you should settle on what you find best to aid her in her attitude and behavior, and to fix problems that come along. Don’t be worried if your frequency is significantly different from another husband’s, since each marriage is different and has different needs. I would focus on the principles of leading with a good set of standards, and of being consistent with discipline. The frequency will work itself out according to need.


6 responses to “What’s the Frequency”

  1. […] it much thought. I have developed and I believe improved over the years. My wife ends up in trouble much less often these days. It might seem daunting at first, but one really does not need a lengthy or complex […]

  2. […] It is an aid to her growth. I believe a husband should be prepared to firmly discipline his wife when she needs it, when she has misbehaved, and also that he cares for her soul in every other way — as our […]

  3. […] rules for her and the household in general, which seek to make it a godly and fruitful home. On the rare occasion I need to spank my wife, she learns her lesson quickly, and she does her best not to repeat it. If […]

  4. Should I also spank her vaginal area? How long should the pain last?

    1. Hello Jasper, Thank you for visiting this discipline site. No, a spanking is given on the bottom. Punishing other parts of the body is much more common in bdsm, but I do not teach or encourage it here. Some husbands put a few strokes on the spot just beneath the bottom on the upper thighs, but other than that, they keep punishment to her bottom.

      Soreness after a spanking depends a lot on how hard or long that you spank. Some spankings stop hurting shortly after the spanking ends. Others will leave her sore on the backside for a day or more. I give and I encourage the latter kind, but I respect the practice of husbands who use milder spankings, if it is successful in giving correction.

      I hope that fully answers you questions.

  5. […] The rest of the time it sits there in its case looking intimidating. Other husbands use it more commonly. It is a fierce instrument, with a reputation that precedes it. I have never used the cane, and I […]

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