The field of wife spanking comes with some common rituals that occur in the large majority of households. When it comes time for a punishment, it is typical for the wife to place herself over her husband’s lap (after undressing of course), or to bend herself over the bed, or a sofa. She remains in position as she is spanked, often hard, and any squirming during discipline is corrected by her husband. If she reaches back to block a swat, she’s usually punished for it. She has to stay in position while she is given her spanking. This is the norm. However, you will hear that a few couples use restraints to hold the wife in place. This may be due to her fear of being spanked, or some innate excitement in being restrained, held down by her husband. I am sometimes asked if I think tying a wife down to be spanked is a good idea. This is my point of view on tying a lady.
I do not think using restraints is wrong. I don’t tell couples not to do this. However, I encourage the opposite. I believe a wife should place herself into her position, and remain willingly there while she is chastised. The use of restrains, such as rope, scarf, or handcuffs, is more associated with the bdsm world. It is naturally more associated with greater levels of control by the man, and also with heavier punishments, though not always. In bdsm binding is nearly universal. In wife spanking it represents a minority. I find it opens the door to the more severe and medieval bdsm world, so it is better to stay clearly in spanking territory, if you will. It only gets heavier from there, into a world that includes literally chains and prisons, as well as punishments that could be included in a third world interrogation session. A spanking simply involves getting bent over and paddled on your bare bottom. I would leave the ropes to someone else.
One major reason to refrain from using ropes — and I do understand the excitement associated with them — is that a submissive wife, one who has accepted her need to be corrected, should be able to place herself in position without any help. That willingness to do so not only comes along with her submissive character, but it reflects her acceptance of the punishment, and her willingness to be corrected. A woman who is tied up can pretend to fight the punishment, by fighting against the restrains, even if she knows she cannot move. A wife who has no restrains must with every moment, and with each stroke that comes down on her bottom, practice acceptance. With acceptance of the punishment, is acceptance of what it is teaching her. It may be true, some women will still squirm a bit out of fear or out of pain. Others might reach back on occasion. However, this is very minor compared to the need to be held down physically throughout the entire session, and reaching back, along with any heavy resistance, can almost always be trained out of her by her husband. She learns to undress, get in position, and keep herself in position while he applies fire to her backside. She moves out of position only when he tells her it is time. Which one is more submissive? Which one is more accepting of her chastisement? The lady who is tied down, or the one who holds herself in position, knowing fully what is coming?
While years ago I used to use restraints with women I disciplined, I no longer do. The handcuffs I used for years for discipline or for sex are long gone. I have never used restraints with my wife. I will use a homemade gag to keep her quiet out of necessity, but that’s about it. Occasionally I have had to hold her firm as she wriggled under the blows of a spanking. But even that was very short term. Once or twice I’ve needed to grab her wrist and keep her from reaching back. That’s about it. Otherwise, my wife knows to place herself as I instruct her, and she knows to remain in position, even during the longer and harder ordeals. She can have stripes on her bottom and be in tears, but she will not move out of her spanking position. It reflects her admirable self-control and submission.
That is what I believe a wife needs to learn, and I find it superior to being tied down. A wife who is restrained does enjoy a certain greater sense of her man’s power over her body. True. She may also like the release in being able to pull with her arms and find herself helpless. That helplessness is thrilling, and at times sexual. There is a great thrill as, perhaps blindfolded, her mind doesn’t know whether to mutter “oh yes,” or “oh no,” and over and over she cries both. Yet these elements are of lesser purpose to her learning to physically submit to the discipline herself. That naturally comes along with learning to submit mentally, to the spanking and to her husband’s authority. She is learning to accept his correction — body and soul. It brings her more fully under his command, and more so than a set of ropes would do. A rope restrains her. Self-control trains her.
Consider that difference if you think you need restrains to practice spanking. You don’t need them. I understand there are some women who have a terrible time holding still. They may have more of a fear reaction to the strokes, and think they’ll be unable to hold still. However, I think you’ll find almost any woman can learn to be still, with trust in her husband as well as some amount of training and practice. Just like following him in marriage, it reflects trust, and an acceptance that he is in the lead and will take care of the matter well. Give yourself over to him. If you’ve been spanked before it shouldn’t be that scary for you.
Husbands who find their wives have trouble holding still should use their instruction, and their correction, to help them learn. Offer your wives encouragement and support in staying in position. Teach them it is unacceptable to move out of position. Wives can learn with some extra strokes that it is worse to move, than it is to stay still. It just brings them further trouble. You’ll find over time that holding still during a spanking is possible, and it instills deep submission. When she bends over of her own accord, she is saying I accept your correction, I trust you, I am ready to learn my lesson.
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