I have written about common spanking positions before. In my discipline descriptions I also mention several positions I have my wife in when I correct her. I don’t think any of the positions stand on their own in the way that OTK (over the knee) does, and it remains an attractive position for both husband and wife. He places his woman over his lap, or over the top of one leg, uses one hand to hold her in place, and with the other commences to spank her bottom. Almost every couple uses this position sometimes, and enjoys its unique benefits.

OTK brings physical closeness between the man and his wife, which few other positions do. It allows him to enjoy her body, and feel it against him, while he goes about his business. It also provides the same closeness for the wife, and may be of relative comfort to her, during the ordeal of her spanking. She is kept in a safe, and fairly comfortable position over her husband’s knee, or his lap, a counterpoint to the shame and pain of her spanking. The husband feels every squirm as he spanks her, as well as any possible acts of resistance. The man’s presence is always palpable to the wife, as she is held up by her man, and kept in place.

The OTK position is also humbling in its own way. A wife’s body is resting on her husband’s, not being able to stand on its own. The connection to a common childhood spanking position also can heighten a woman’s vulnerability as she is placed OTK. She is ready to release her guilt, and receive her punishment from a trusted and beloved person. Certain other positions connote more formal discipline, such as school paddling, or civic whipping, but OTK carries an intimacy and humbling that is most like childhood, and in its closeness appropriate for marriage.

A husband spanking his wife OTK usually has one hand touching her at all times, along with feeling her body draped over his legs. His hand, or his arm, holds her firmly in place. Even when holding her firmly is not necessary, it provides a constant warm connection during her spanking, letting her feel his hand on her bare waist, or the weight of his arm over her. He senses as her body grows warm, and if it begins to sweat. Her husband virtually surrounds her as she dangles over him, getting lovingly put back in her place. This is an advantage during discipline, and reminds both of the loving connection between them. Giving her a bare-hand spanking only adds to this connection.

The OTK position sitting in a chair is similar, and offers a unique experience. A woman’s near complete, or complete weight will be on her husband’s lap. She will feel her own legs, and arms hanging down. It may not be as comfortable as OTK on a bed, but the physical connection is still there, as is the reliance on her husband’s power to hold her in place. Just make sure you have a strong chair, as you don’t want to end up rolling on the floor together, and have to buy a new one. Men who have a common chair for work or for rest, may find it makes an advantageous place to correct their wives OTK, and may be a constant reminder to them both of the husband’s position. A wife will see the spot of correction each day. Others use a special chair only for discipline, which itself may put them in the right mindset for a correction session, once it is brought out.

Other than the warm physical contact, I find giving my wife a spanking OTK makes it easier for me to lecture her. There is something about the position and connection itself that helps the words flow as I explain her wrong, and verbally remind her of her position and her right behavior. It aids in being firm in chastisement, and in being aware of its loving purpose. It can help the wife remember her husband’s love as well, and communicate her remorse. You are literally holding her close as you correct her, and that affects the mindset slightly. The words of correction pour out without having to feel forced or very formal. Other spanking positions that come off as more formal punishment, and lack that connection, may aid in some regards, but they are distant to the degree they do not help my words of correction flow. You may not feel the same as you try it though.

Correcting your wife over your lap requires you avoid longer instruments, either because they’d be awkward or impossible to use. The larger kind of paddle should be replaced with the smaller kind. You could not use a cane, although a riding crop would work. You may use a folded-over belt on her bottom, but it will be less effective than using if from more of a distance. OTK works best if you spank with your hand, a small paddle, a hairbrush, or similar instruments. A hand spanking over the knee forges quite a warm connection. It may not be as hard as one with an instrument, but her bottom will be bright red, and your hand will be changing color too.

The spanking husband has many options available to him in how to manage discipline. I think most will agree with some of these unique aspects of disciplining a wife OTK. A few men use the position nearly all the time. I’d have to admit it’s my favorite, despite its shortcomings in limiting the kind of instrument you can choose to give discipline. Having a wife in such an intimate position reminds of the heart of the marriage itself. So too does a husband’s hold on her, even if he has to hold her down. Her tears during the spanking will nearly fall upon him. As she feels his body, on which she is supported, she is reminded she belongs to him.


27 responses to “OTK and You”

  1. Midwestmom Avatar

    I sometimes ask if I can please be disciplined over his lap when I feel the need to be close. Either he was planning to anyway so he does or he splits the spanking in two. First the spanking he intended to give me usually bent over something so he can use his belt properly then we finish otk with our paddle. He makes it clear that he loves the closeness it brings too but sometimes stronger discipline is needed.

  2. NakedMotherOfTwo Avatar

    Which is the preferred method?
    1- Present myself fully naked?
    2 – Present myself naked from the waist down?
    3- Or allow my husband to pull my pants and panties down?

    Either one offers some form of reliance on my husband and hesitation on my part as to what’s about to happen to my exposed or soon to be exposed butt. Either way I wind up completely naked as most of the time I am without clothes and naked in our home. as my husband wants. I am asking as for when we get home and I still have my clothes on.

    I also prefer it when my husband is fully naked to administering my punishment. not so much when he is dressed.

    1. Hello Naked, Thank you for your comment. I have not heard of many husbands who give correction while they are naked, but there may be some. Generally a wife is expected to be partly or completely nude because she is being punished, and it heightens her vulnerability, humbles her, and makes it clear she belongs to her husband. For a man to be naked as he gave the spanking might be a distraction to him as well.

      I did this one article on nudity during punishment if you have not seen it: https://spankingyourwife.com/2020/05/10/woman-uncovered/

      I also have this one about nudity as a form of training, but I do not recommend using it all the time: https://spankingyourwife.com/2021/03/05/keeping-her-bare/

    2. alanrilley Avatar

      If the man is naked it isn’t really about punishment or discipline anymore, it’s more about just play and enjoyment for both, which is fine if that’s the idea. At least from my experience, it’s hard to be taken as a source of authority without properly clothing on. A wife should bare her naked body before her man as a way to show her status in the relationship and the ownership the man has over his wife.

    3. johnsonjelena45 Avatar

      I was going to give you my answer, NakedMotherOfTwo. #4. My husband liked to see me stand before him, as he started to scold and watch me take my pants and panties down and off. Panties always on the floor. Or if wearing a dress or skirt- those off too. He was most often fully dress for my spanking. (sometimes wearing a dress shirt and tie) rolled up sleeves and dress pants on.


    4. HappyWifey Avatar

      I believe that for discipline the husband should remain dressed and the wife be naked. This emphasizes his dominance and her vulnerability. often just the act of being undressed can lead me to tears.

      Regarding who does the undressing, for me it depends. If I’m going to be spanked when Hubby returns from work, he will make me strip and go about my chores naked as a reminder of my impending discipline. This has a strong humbling effect on me and I am fully in the submissive mindset needed to truly learn from my discipline by the time he gets home.

      If I’m receiving my spanking my immediately I must stand in front of my hubby an keep my hands on my head while he scolds me. As he scolds he undresses me. I am not allowed to fight him. The only time I can take my hands off my head is when its necessary for him to take something off. Standing this was, totally exposed while he undresses me physically and dresses me down verbally is also very humbling and I never fail to cry as he puts me in my place and preps me for a spanking.

      Which is better, or worse, I couldn’t say each is uniquely humiliating and awful. And each is extremely effective in helping me learn from my punishment.

      [edited by Aron for grammar and content]

  3. ThatWifeLife Avatar

    This has for sure become my husband’s favorite position since he tried it. I was too far along in pregnancy to do OTK when we first started CDD. My very first spanking postpartum, he tried it and has very rarely used any other since. I’m only a couple months from my belly being too big again this pregnancy, and I think we are both going to miss OTK that last trimester or so. If he’s not having to use a belt, he will still sit beside me on the bed and hold me close as I bend over the end of it supported by pillows when I’m very pregnant. Despite the pain and humbling, being held helps me know it’s all in love, and I think it helps him remember that discipline is part of his caring for me, even though he doesn’t like to have to do it.

    1. Thanks for your comment. Congratulations on your new baby. You’ll be able to use the position again soon enough. A spanking OTK definitely communicates that caring and loving element, despite how hard it is. I’m glad you both appreciate it.

      1. ThatWifeLife Avatar

        Thank you! This is our 7th baby (plus 2 losses,) and we feel so very blessed with the big family the Lord has given us!

  4. Hello.

    I just wanted to ask you if your blog is fixion or realy example of your own family.
    Whether your blog is fiction or not, this is a beautiful blog and describes a beautiful solid marriage. It can be seen from your writing that you are well educated and write sophisticated texts and know exactly what you are talking about.

    1. Hello Anna, Thank you for your comment. I’m very glad you find my writing to be educated and informative. This website presents my marital life accurately, except for a few details here and there which I change for the sake of anonymity. Those details are not consequential to the subjects I am communicating.

      I am a happily married Christian man, and I have disciplined my wife since we were married. The descriptions I post of the spankings I give detail exactly how they happen. The beliefs presented are my own as well. The only exception is when I post guest articles, and that is noted at the top of the article.

      Take care.

      1. Hello Aron and thank you for replying. best regards.

  5. I have a question about rewards for a well behaved wife. My husband frequently rewards me for better behavior and it sometimes feels childish to me. Is it common for a husband to have a system of positive reinforcement as well?

    1. Hello Jess, I don’t her a lot about that from husbands who spank. It’s not a bad idea though. I do not use a reward system myself, and I consider that on a daily basis, and throughout the year, my wife receives my praise, love, devotion, and other things which build her up. I don’t see how adding rewards would be necessary. However, if a husband finds it produces good results, he may wish to use them. This is especially true if a wife struggles a lot. Some employers offer incentives and bonuses to their workers, so regardless of age, rewards can be a form of extra motivation to us, and make us want to achieve more. Thank you.

    2. Jess, as a wife and from my perspective, several things come to mind when one mentions rewards or a positive reinforcement system. I think, by nature, most respond to reinforcements of any kind. It’s always good to know you’re on the right track and doing things the way that pleases those you try to help; however, I would press pause when it becomes a quid pro quo arrangement, especially in a Christian marriage endeavoring to demonstrate the relationship between Christ and the Church. I think there is nothing wrong with gifts to express the appreciation felt for a wife’s (or husband’s) efforts, or verbal validations. But, it should be freely given without attachment to a work. Just as we learn we must accept God’s gift of salvation and cannot acquire it in our own power. Likewise, we must follow Christ, as we are called, by faith, knowing our fruits of faith are shown in our works. In marriage, wives have a purpose and we need to seek ways to fulfill that purpose in our relationship with Christ. We should not be living our purpose as a favor to our husbands or because we will get something out of it. That discounts God’s design and kingdom plan for merely a token of worldly pleasure. It also sets us up for an unhealthy cycle of expectation. Wives do what we do to please God and our husband’s. We draw near to Christ as a way to be more like Him. Our fulfillment needs to come from knowing we are growing and moving toward entire sanctification in our relationship with Christ. Thank the Lord we have help from our husbands in that regard! Expecting external rewards based on Godly growth or behaviors guided by a husband’s rules for earthly dominion is a dangerous mindset. Alternatively, if you feel you have made considerable growth in an area, request that the two of you celebrate together and let him decide how or plan together. When working together, your submission allows him to be more of a provider and protector. He can provide for your emotional needs, as well as your physical and will balance that with family financial needs. When you trust him, you’ll accept whatever form of provision and protection he gives. Yet, again, if you feel you need something, never be afraid to take your concern to him. When you hold back true desires and don’t allow him to know what you think and feel, you remove his ability to completely care for you. Obviously, this is much more in depth than a simple question about getting a new outfit when you meet goals for the month, but I truly believe thinking on these things is important. There is potential to set oneself up for disappointment and wrong thinking regarding true biblical submission.

    3. Hi Jess,
      If in your opinion positive feedback is a reward (for me is), so yes, I get rewards.
      For example, we are working on my specific behaviour, and any time I’ve done wrong I got spanking, but also any time I’ve done good, he tell me a lot how he appreciate that, how much it means to him, how good I am, how he love me for trying being better.
      Those kind words, for me, it’s a reward 🙂 and he knows it.

  6. TxColGrl83 Avatar

    If I *HAD to choose a position this one does feel the most safe for me. We really only spank over the side of the bed or over his knee. If I am over the bed sometimes I struggle to stay still, which is not a good thing. When I am over his knee he holds me super tight around my waist and my legs with his. This does force me to stay still. I also do feel closer to him, not just physically but I think emotionally. The downside is also him holding me tight. I hate the feeling of being held tight and not being able to move!!! It’s awful! Not to mention as I’m being held tight I am also getting a spanking that hurts so badly I can barely stand it! So there are some ups and downs for me as a wife. I do feel “safer”. I feel protected in a way… I think my husband likes it for all the reasons listed, and because he does have more control. I do not always struggle to stay still over the bed, but sometimes I can’t help it. This gets me in more trouble so avoiding that is a big plus! Thank you very much Aaron

    1. You’re welcome. Thank you for sharing your insights about the position. It does help to be able to hold the wife in place more easily, even if it’s better she remain still. I’m glad you can appreciate the closeness that OTK offers.

    2. I think we like to know we are not alone in our feeling. So your words got to me: “I am also getting a spanking that hurts so badly I can barely stand it!” My husband always used OTK because I couldn’t help struggling and try get away to avoid the pain. But he was so strong I was going anyplace and don’t think he ever missed his aim. And he like to aim at the same place – many times in a row- my two sit spots.

      1. Yes, maintaining good aim is another advantage of OTK. Thanks.

  7. Thank you for this post. I have only this year begun correcting my wife by spanking, and I do believe that over the knee does bring about the desired closeness I wish to feel while administering her punishments. I have, however, begun to question whether I believe hand-spanking is best for us. I’m concerned that she is no longer seeing my hand as loving, but rather more as threatening. For this reason, I have been considering trying a paddle. I don’t wish to cause her any more pain for her spankings, but I want her to view me only in the most loving sense. Do you happen to have any recommendations for a paddle that won’t really hurt her? Maybe something that feels just like my hand does? Again, I don’t want more pain – just a different source. Thank you for your time.

    1. Hello John, Thanks for your question. I don’t know of any paddle that does not hurt more than a hand. The only kind I am familiar with are solid wood, and can deliver a punishment harsher than a hand. There are also paddles made out of synthetic material, but they are not easy to bear either. I use a small paddle that is easy to use OTK.

      If you wanted to use an instrument for spanking, but don’t feel you need to take the heat up, you can use a variety of instruments, but with more moderate force. It may take time adjusting to, but I believe you can get the results you need that way.

      I hope that helps.

      1. What about a small leather paddle?

        1. aronhusband Avatar

          They make those too, and they would likely be mild compared to a small wooden paddle. If it were larger and leather and had some swing to it, then it could be harsh. Wood is easier to control though.

  8. Bridgette Avatar

    Just to add after my other comments.
    Husband nearly always disciplines over the knee style. I have to prepare for him – usually white panties, short tartan skirt, bra, blouse and a tie. This is removed bit by bit , until I am naked and standing before him – hands on head – with everything on display for him to inspect – including a very red and sore bottom.

    If I have taken the punishment well – I am rewarded with an orgasm – and I also have to give him oral – and to swallow all.

    This works for us very well in our domestic arrangements. Thank you so much for providing your thoughts and opinions on domestic discipline

    1. I’m glad you appreciate the website, Bridgette. Thank you for sharing your description of being spanked.

      1. Bridgette Avatar

        That’s ok Aron – it’s nice to read some of the articles – and to see how much we have in common with others here. It would be nice to have a search option – as there is so much advice here.

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