Spank Your Wife

Readers Poll: What are You, and What do You do Here?

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by

aronhusband
in

I have two polls for our readers today, one about how you identify your discipline practice and one on what you do here on this discipline website. Interested in hearing your answers.

  1. What do you call your use of discipline?

A) Domestic Discipline

B) BDSM (or another similar acronym like D/S)

C) Wife Spanking

D) Taken in Hand

E) Other

F) I don’t currently use discipline

2. What do you use this website for?

A) It turned me on to wife spanking and helped me learn

B) It gives me some useful tips and advice about marriage

C) I like to express myself in the comments and meet other like-minded people

D) I come here because it pisses me off

E) I read from an interest in the practice and from a sociological standpoint

F) Spanking arouses me, so it’s how I get some kicks

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33 responses to “Readers Poll: What are You, and What do You do Here?”

  1. PatriotInPearls Avatar
    PatriotInPearls

    1. E (I don’t think I call it anything, I guess if it was anything it’d be C.)🤔

    2. A,B, and C… Wait is that even allowed? Are we supposed to choose only one? 😂

    1. aronhusband Avatar
      aronhusband

      Sure, you can choose more than one. Feel free to explain. People have practiced discipline in marriage for many years without having a special name for it.

      1. PatriotInPearls Avatar
        PatriotInPearls

        Ok, I haven’t ever taken a poll so I wasn’t sure. 🤣

        So, I was thinking more about Question 1. Like I said, I don’t call it anything and I said probably C if I had to choose one of those listed because certainly it does involve wife spanking. But really, it is a lot more than that. I think I’d refer to it as honoring Biblical Headship. The reason I even wanted to adopt this into my life and marriage was to become more like Christ, and to honor my husband. The Lord has been so good in my life, and my husband has been my faithful and loving man for going on 19 years of marriage at the end of this month. They both deserve better than I have been, and I want to BE better.

        Question 2: I had a vague knowledge that “domestic discipline was a “thing” among some people but when I came upon Aron’s site I was amazed at the level of knowledge and understanding he has. It took a long time to settle it all in my heart but I’m here now to learn more and encourage others along the way if I can. All to the glory of the One Who died for me.

      2. Oswald Avatar
        Oswald

        Suppose it would be E, I don’t really call it anything. Just marriage, one small part of it. When the old lady gets out of line and simple verbal correction has failed, she’ll find herself stripped and thoroughly spanked while receiving a stern lecture. It was never really a discussion and we certainly don’t consider it a lifestyle.

        Second would be B, I occasionally find something usful I had not considered on my own or something I feel that my wife would find worthwhile to send her.

        1. aronhusband Avatar
          aronhusband

          Thank you. Spanking in marriage doesn’t really need a name, and some people just understand implicitly that it fits with marriage. It sounds like you know how to manage your wife well. I’m glad this website manages to offer some new ideas, even with your experience.

          Take care.

        2. CC Avatar
          CC

          Hi Oswald,

          Would you be willing to give some more information about how you and your wife started your discipline journey? I am intrigued by you saying it was not a discussion! Did you just tell your wife those were the new rules? What sort of resistance did she put up?

          Many thanks,
          CC

      3. Fernanda Avatar
        Fernanda

        Question 1
        I never thought of a name for this situation. I’m torn between options A and E.

        Question 2
        I think the answer would be b and c. I’m curious to know how other women deal with spanking. When I moved out of my parents’ house at 17, I thought I would never be spanked again. But in the last two years, I was spanked at 25 and 26 years old. And last year was the year I was spanked the most.

        1. aronhusband Avatar
          aronhusband

          Thank you for your answer. I hope the website and the readers here help you learn more about dealing with being spanked. You’re definitely never too old for a spanking. Some of the challenges also remain the same, regardless of age. Take care.

          1. Fernanda Avatar
            Fernanda

            Yes, the stories and posts on this site help me understand how to deal with spanking.

            Thank you.

  2. Theophilus Avatar
    Theophilus

    1. E-Other, though many of the options would fit.
    .
    My greatest desire is that our marriage would reflect to our children and the world as accurate an illustration of God and his wonderful relationship with us as possible. So perhaps I would call what we do “an attempted reflection.”

    2. Primarily B, though again other options may fit.
    .
    For the non-theological among us, please bear with me. Divine Revelation is found in God’s Word, the Bible. However, it is unwise to simply run with just any idea one happens to come up with while reading the Bible. God also gave us Natural Revelation, which we can gain by studying what happens in the world around us. We should see an agreement between Divine and Natural revelation. That is where this site comes in. Aron’s articles and the numerous comments provide a wealth of natural revelation to study. Such a check is vital before any idea is put into practice.

    1. PatriotInPearls Avatar
      PatriotInPearls

      Please forgive me if I’m misunderstanding what you’re saying or if I’m overstepping in any way. I’m simply trying to better understand your point.

      When I read this, I found myself wondering about the use of the term “natural revelation.” It seems to me that other people’s articles and comments would be their interpretations and opinions about what they have observed, rather than natural revelation itself.

      I also wondered about the statement that studying those articles and comments is a “vital” check before putting a biblical idea into practice. Could that unintentionally place human observations in a position that Scripture does not give them?

      My understanding has always been that Scripture is our final authority. Certainly, creation and our experiences can help us understand and apply God’s Word, and they may provide useful insights. However, it seems to me that our observations and conclusions should be tested by Scripture rather than being viewed alongside it as an equal authority.

      Again, I’m not trying to be argumentative. I’m genuinely seeking clarification and would appreciate any help in understanding your perspective.

  3. Theophilus Avatar
    Theophilus

    Excellent response, PatriotInPearls. I love it!
    .
    In short, you are right. The Bible is the absolute and final authority.
    .
    God’s Word tells us WHAT we should do. We men often need advice on HOW to do it, especially when handling someone as precious and delicate as our wives. This is where wise counsel, the testimonials of others, and careful observation of what does or does not work come in. All of these non-scriptural sources of truth would fall under the broad canopy of Natural Revelation. Again, I will recommend Aron’s content on this site for any young husband.
    .
    For myself, it is vital to make sure that my idea is in line with God’s idea. Romans 12:2c tells us to “dokimazein” (test and approve) what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God. Does that make sense?

  4. PatriotInPearls Avatar
    PatriotInPearls

    Thank you for the reply, Sir. All day I fretted over whether my comment would be received well or cause unintended offense.

    NOW I see where you are coming from and I agree with you wholeheartedly.

    I’ve read through so many of these articles, and I have shared some of them with my husband as well. I never had any idea how much thought and study would go into a man leading his wife and family well, and in the ways of the Lord.

    We all certainly would do well
    by listening and learning from others.

    My dad was an alcoholic before he got saved in 1972. That was way before I was born. But he taught us to stay away from alcohol, it wasn’t worth it. It destroyed his first family. So, I listened. I’ve never tasted a sip.

    Proverbs 11:14: Where no counsel is, the people fall: but in the multitude of counsellors there is safety.

    Proverbs 24:6: For by wise counsel thou shalt make thy war: and in multitude of counsellors there is safety.

    I see this site as a well run ministry and I thank you for the comments you share here. They help me too!

    Now I think I’ll take a cue from
    1 Thessalonians 4:11

    11 And that ye study to be quiet, and to do your own business, and to work with your own hands, as we commanded you;

    🤣 I’m glad you didn’t get upset with my question but it honestly stressed me out after I sent it. I don’t want it to appear that I’m trying to talk down to a man, especially one I can see knows the Bible. It didn’t sit well in my heart after I sent it.

    May the Lord continue to bless you and your family!

    1. ALifeSurrendered Avatar
      ALifeSurrendered

      You were concerned about giving offense in your comment above. I often think critically when I reread something I wrote and wonder if I came across as rude or talking down to a man.

      I know I did a few days ago when I came across a post on Facebook regarding “biblical marriages” which in this guy’s opinion, means a man marrying multiple women and making as many babies as he can. I know I was critical of him in that post, and that I probably shouldn’t have commented at all, but this sudden surge of posts pushing for “polygyny” is irritating me. These guys claim it’s biblical, even though it’s clear how well that works. I must learn to ignore. What he encourages is actually criminal. And it’s definitely NOT biblical because there’s no way he can lead multiple wives and raise up that many children in the care and admonition of the Lord.

      Thanks for the reminder to control my fingers!

  5. Theophilus Avatar
    Theophilus

    PatriotInPearls, you are most welcome. Searching the Scriptures to see whether things are true is a noble trait (Acts 17:11). I am sorry you felt anxiety over your post.
    .
    And yes, a man must put a lot of thought and care into his relationship with his wife. In Jeremiah 6:16 God says, “Stand by the roads, and look, and ask for the ancient paths, where the good way is; and walk in it, and find rest for your souls.” My wife and I have found rest for our souls in following these old paths, and our marriage is a delight (and a work in progress). Sadly, the very last part of the above verse reads, “But they said, ‘We will not walk in it.’ “ Not everyone has eyes to see or ears to hear like you do.

  6. Sophia Avatar
    Sophia

    I enjoy your polls, Aron! What a great way to encourage people to share!

    For number one, I used to think of it as D, before I was married, when I had a very romanticized version of discipline in my head. It’s literally true, of course, that my husband has taken me in hand, but I suppose neither one of us really refers to it as that. Most often, we say A, but my husband also says C. For E, we add Christian domestic discipline or marital discipline. Often, we’ll simply talk about my husband’s headship, a sacred responsibility that extends beyond his right to spank me.

    For number two, there are so many reasons we come here! A, B, C, and E sum it up pretty well.

    Thank you, Aron, for continuing to educate your readers on the important role of discipline in a healthy marriage. Your advice has benefitted so many!

    Blessings,
    Sophia

    1. aronhusband Avatar
      aronhusband

      Thank you for explaining your understanding of discipline in your marriage, as well as your activities here at this website. Your comments are valued. I hope you and your family continue to be greatly blessed.

  7. Cornerstone Avatar
    Cornerstone

    For question 1 it’s F as i am unmarried. in conversation about the topic i use A, C and D. in my former life i used B but then i grew up.

    For question 2 its B, C and E. With the addition that i’m looking for a wife that shares my philosophy on marriage.

    And about that WARNING:
    I have received some responses on the personal i placed on the “your place for singles” post. Some of them seem genuine, but most are obviously scammers. They relay want to talk about how lustfull and horny they are and sends you pictures that are AI or some model found online. Be carefull out there fellow seekers.

    1. aronhusband Avatar
      aronhusband

      Hello Cornerstone, Thanks for explaining. I hope you find a good wife soon who knows what marriage is about. Once you are both united in belief, it works very smoothly.

      You can contact me by e-mail and let me know of anyone you are confident is a scammer.

  8. ALifeSurrendered Avatar
    ALifeSurrendered

    1. F
    My husband doesn’t currently discipline me. It is my hope that eventually he will, but he does not at this time.

    2. A, B, and E.
    My husband and I had had a fight and he wasn’t speaking to me, and one night, I actually googled the phrase “spanking your wife.” From there, I found the original version of this blog.

    I have learned a lot of things about the husband’s authority in marriage and aspects of my responsibility in marriage from this blog.

    That naturally flows into E.

    Initially I would have selected F, but I think it’s not so much that as the others.

    1. aronhusband Avatar
      aronhusband

      Thank you. I’m glad this site has been so helpful to you. I think a lot of women know intuitively that a spanking will help them, especially if there has been conflict or bad behavior. I hope your husband eventually comes around as well, but do your best to serve him as things are.

    2. Sophia Avatar
      Sophia

      Oh, Surrendered, my heart goes out to women like you who know how much marital discipline could benefit them, but aren’t yet receiving it, either because they are unmarried or because their husbands aren’t yet convinced of its necessity. Pray for your husband and continue to serve him as best you can. Offer him your contrition after an argument and let him know how much you would like to atone for your behavior. Assure him that you would not resent him if he were to punish you, but would instead offer him your respect and gratitude. The silent treatment is so much worse than a spanking. One eats away at a marriage, while the other strengthens and restores.

      Also, I think it’s quite natural for a woman who hasn’t yet been spanked, but desires it in her heart, to think it might be a romantic or erotic experience. I thought so as well, but that fantasy popped like a balloon for me the first time my husband disciplined me with a well-deserved spanking. I pray that you will soon experience discipline in your own marriage and have the opportunity to see that, while it is not the least bit sensual in the moment (for the wife, at least), a man exercising his headship firmly and with conviction lights a spark that carries over into every aspect of your life together, including the marriage bed. My attraction to my husband was always abundant, but it has deepened even more than I thought possible since he introduced spanking in our marriage. Through his application of discipline, I have come to know the full extent of his strength, physically, spiritually, and emotionally, and this makes him devastatingly attractive to me. So F isn’t completely wrong, it’s just not the whole story.

      Praying for you and your husband,
      Sophia

      1. ALifeSurrendered Avatar
        ALifeSurrendered

        Hi Sophia,

        I definitely seek to serve my husband as much as I can. I work full time, but he comes first. He’s been ill the last few days, and still working on a job, and he called me yesterday, hoping I was leaving soon. I wasn’t planning to (I worked a short day Wednesday due to his illness and needed to work a 12 hour day), but I asked him what he needed. He let me know that he needed my help to finish what he was doing for the day. I packed up and headed to his job, where we finished up the day’s work.

        I used to sometimes feel annoyed when interrupted in what I was doing like that. But now I’m grateful for the opportunity to be there and help him.

        I also follow his preferences for my appearance and many other things.

        I hope eventually he chooses to bring in discipline, but in the meantime, I’m going to do the best I can to be the best wife I can.

        Thanks for your perspective! ❤️❤️

        1. Sophia Avatar
          Sophia

          Sweet Surrendered, I couldn’t help myself and had to go searching for where we’d spoken before. I’m so glad I did, because I completely missed your reply. What a treasure you must be to your husband! Your desire to serve him above all else is truly admirable.

          When my husband and I were first dating, I was so eager to be submit myself to him, but he was only just beginning to experiment with leadership in a romantic relationship. He’d recently discovered that he wanted a Biblically traditional, husband-led marriage, and I was the first girl he pursued with that goal in mind. He tread cautiously for fear of scaring me away, but it just left me craving so much more from him. So I gave myself little challenges. If he stated a preference, I made it a rule. If there was something he didn’t care for, I cut it from my life. I gave him control over me before he ever claimed it by asking his permission when I made plans. I looked for new ways to serve him and then made it a part of my routine. I brought a home-cooked meal to his office most days, then stayed on to help, straightening up, answering phones, and doing whatever looked like it needed to be done. Soon, he felt confident enough to simply assign me a task, knowing that I would swiftly and cheerfully obey.

          In our relationship, my eagerness to obey came before he gave me any commands. My desire for his punishment came long before he’d set the rules that I would (inevitably) break. Before he’d even realized that his rules would need to be enforced. I did my best to remove any barriers to his future headship so that he could forge ahead when he was ready without feeling like a tyrant.

          Your sweet story of dropping everything for your husband when he’d simply expressed a hope that you’d be leaving work soon reminds me of those early days with my soon-to-be husband. He was letting go of all of the biases he had been raised with, learning how to cherish and protect the woman he loved without sacrificing his masculinity. Finding the sovereign leader within himself. All I could do was show him my eagerness to be led. Real men are demonized in this culture, and it can take time for them to feel like they can openly claim what is rightfully theirs. You are an inspiration for embracing the opportunity to help your man, finding joy and satisfaction in your service of him. I know this is harder for women who work outside the home, which makes your sacrifice for your man all the more precious.

          Blessings,
          Sophia

          1. ALifeSurrendered Avatar
            ALifeSurrendered

            Hi Sophia,

            Thank you so much for your kind words and encouragement. ❤️

            My husband and I have been married 23 years. There have been rough spots over the years, but I never had a good example of wife in my mother or any other woman I knew. We’ve found our way. This man is the other half I never knew I was missing❤️❤️❤️!

  9. biblicalwife Avatar
    biblicalwife

    1. E We just call it a Biblical marriage. We believe this was the norm for most of human history.

    2. B,C Biblical marriage has made this taboo and this site makes us feel less alone. It’s interesting that the world will accept the femdom insanity as a kink before they would consider a Biblical approach to a relationship. Even the churches seem to tolerate and even promote women being the head of the man. Every other resource on this topic gets into perversion. You align with our values the most.

    1. aronhusband Avatar
      aronhusband

      That’s a great answer. I’m happy that this website aligns with your biblical values. Really, the name biblical marriage should be enough, since the mean is the head, and discipline comes naturally with that position. It’s not a special lifestyle, just a marriage.

      1. Sophia Avatar
        Sophia

        I love your observation, Aron! It’s not a lifestyle, it’s just marriage.

  10. Monica Avatar
    Monica

    A. Christian Domestic Discipline

    C. I appreciate being part of a community that understands and supports traditional marriage with the husband as its head. Even in my conservative community there are some anti-Christian elements and many people that object to a male-dominated marriage, and you frequently run into judgmental and critical people. So this site is a great place to hear from likeminded people, to share and to learn from others experiences.

    1. aronhusband Avatar
      aronhusband

      Thank you, Monica. I hope to provide a place which speaks clearly about the man’s authority, and does not apologize for supporting the different roles of men and women. We’re happy to have you here.

  11. softly Avatar
    softly

    F and B.
    My husband is nominally Christian and very progressive. I didn’t realize the full extent of this until after we married and had children. I was a moderate and became much more conservative as I studied the Bible in my attempt to bring up our children as Christians. I would love to have a traditionally Christian marriage, whether or not that involved domestic discipline, but it’s up to God if it will ever be laid on his heart. Being a submissive wife to a liberal husband often feels lonely and thankless. It’s difficult to speak my mind about social and political issues without upsetting him. He gets all the benefits of a traditional wife without having to deal with the destruction his liberal beliefs are causing in his friends’ marriages. But reading this blog (and of course the Bible) gives me inspiration to keep going. I understand that our marriage isn’t about me obeying him for his sake but rather me being obedient to God and setting a good example for my children. Thank you for your work, Aron.

    1. aronhusband Avatar
      aronhusband

      You’re welcome, Softly. I aim to help men and women in marriage as much as I can through this website. That is indeed a tough situation, but you are not the only wife who faces being married to a man who does not believe or follow the word of God. Your faithfulness to Christ as well as your submission to your husband will be a witness to him. The best thing would be for him to have a male teacher to help teach him in the faith, but this is much easier with a new believer than one who is already set in his beliefs. Avoid argument, but speak the truth when need be. Your behavior will be a light to him. Feel free to write me if you’d like to discuss it further. Thank you for your comment.

      Blessings.

    2. Theophilus Avatar
      Theophilus

      Softly, when God is allowed to rule in a family, even if in only one member, he benefits and blesses the whole family. In your case, “the unbelieving husband is made holy because of his wife” (1 Corinthians 7:14). Do not grow weary in well doing. You will reap in due time if you do not faint.
      .
      As you yield yourself to your husband, yield yourself to God so that even if your husband does not obey the word, he may be won without a word by your conduct (1 Peter 3:1). Ask God daily for that meek and quiet spirit.
      .
      Finally, as you desire your head (your husband) to lead and chasten you, remember that he also has a Head, Jesus Christ (1 Corinthians 11:3). You can ask God for both relationships to be made right. Pray privately, not in front of your hubby, that the Lord would bring his discipline on your husband for his good, and the good of his spiritual relationship with God. Only when your husband knows the Lordship of Christ can he be ready to be lord to you.

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