Why You Should Use Discipline in Your Marriage

I encourage the use of spanking in marriage because I know it works. I’ve seen it work. I sincerely believe more couples need to try and apply discipline in their marriage, and that very few would find no value in it. Discipline fits naturally into the structure of a marriage, and allows the husband, who is the head of the home, to correct his wife effectively when needed. I want to list what I find are the benefits of spanking, both as discipline itself, and as superior to other forms of discipline. If I missed out a few advantages, please let me know in the comments. 

It helps keep a wife soft and submissive: Perhaps the strongest benefit of spanking your wife is the general effect which it has on her character. It adds to her softness, and helps her more easily be submissive towards her husband. It gives her a deeper feminine character, and she responds to her husband more often with peace and with gentle replies. This is not just in how she submits to her husband though, but resonates through her entire spirit, allowing her to grow in her gentleness and femininity. A woman shows that character to all, and not just to her husband. She is meek not just as an act at home, but in her spirit. Spanking helps her grow into this gentleness. It breaks down any resistance she has to it. She accepts that she is not in control. Over time, the woman will love seeing the difference in herself, as submission becomes something to hunger for, and which she loves to experience. Being bared, verbally corrected, and spanked over her man’s knee, she grows as a woman. 

It helps deter bad behavior: This is one of the most practical benefits of spanking your wife. It keeps her away from bad behavior, which helps her and helps the home in many ways. Leading his wife in virtue, and correcting any bad behavior is a responsibility of the husband, and spanking her helps him achieve this. nearly any couple which use spanking would testify to the bad behavior which punishment of this kind either made less frequent, or put in the past entirely. I have seen it work quickly in my own marriage, in helping my wife avoid lateness, stop procrastinating on her work, and avoid argument and backtalk. There are certainly more serious wrongs that consistent spanking also deters. Her mind will remember there is serious punishment for certain behavior, and over time she will stay away from it. Her man will feel more present with her always, and she will remember his words better than she had. Her man will be her guiding power. All of this will benefit a marriage for many years. 

It puts a woman at rest: A spanking calms down a woman from any number of overwhelming feelings, often negative ones. Often those feelings are what facilitated her bad behavior, other times they welled inside her up apart from it. Being over her husband’s knee can wash her clean of distress, uncertainty, worry, petty anger, and bitterness. Some of this comes along with being washed clean of guilt, and some comes along simply with experiencing her man’s power over her and pouring out her tears. She has peace inside in the long run, even if she dislikes being spanked.  A spanking is healing in this effect. It soothes her soul. 

It gets rid of guilt: Guilt is a reality when a wrong has been done. Guilt is also a feeling, which sometimes comes with that reality, and sometimes does not. Spanking washes the wife clean of objective guilt for her wrong, allowing her to experience the penalty for what she did. It very often washes her of the feeling of guilt as well, which can torment the soul indefinitely. A spanking which is thorough and hard leaves no doubt that a price has been paid, and the wrong is in the past. Any mark on her as an offender has been removed, and she will love being free of it. Her wrong is forgotten. Her husband will not bring it up again and they both are free to move on to different and better things. 

It is more convenient than other punishments: As I have written on at some length, a spanking is an excellent punishment for its sheer convenience. It does not take very long to give a lecture, and to spank a lady’s bottom. Even with some talk afterward, it can easily be done in fifteen to thirty minutes. Other forms of discipline often take longer, or are impractical in other ways. A husband who punishes his wife by taking her phone, or taking her card, may actually make it impossible for her to do some necessities. Grounding can go on for days, and be very inconvenient since a woman needs to go out for some matters. There is no such worry in giving a spanking. You simply find time to have a session, usually in the evening, and it’s over quickly. The problem is put in the past. It is further faster than trying to talk out problems, or than having ongoing conflicts over power. Those things can literally go on for years, as couples often simply cannot come to peace, or to an agreement. A few minutes over the knee takes care of the problem. 

It is more effective than other punishments: In my experience, and the experience of other couples, spanking is more effective than other forms of discipline. A part of this is because of how intimate spanking is, and because of the pain of the spanking. A woman feels her husband’s authority much more powerfully when bent over and naked than she does writing some lines. She feels his authority with each stroke of the punishment which comes down, whether it is a cane or a paddle slicing the air. The pain and humbling of the spanking also create a better deterrent than some other punishments, since it is generally more difficult to face a hard spanking than to get your toys temporarily taken away. She often experiences real regret when bearing a whipping, wishing she had never made the choice that placed her there, and hating the disapproval of her husband. Spanking speaks to a woman’s soul shaping her, and letting her know whom she belongs to. A grounding generally does not. Taking away privileges does not. I believe this is understood easily by anyone who really think about the matter.  

It creates a marriage with less overall conflict: In marriage where spanking is used, most will testify that there is little conflict. Either conflict is nearly nonexistent (this is true in my own marriage), or it is at least far less frequent than it had been before starting discipline. The explosive problems you hear about in so many marriages that make them miserable never appear to begin with. Discipline is a key to household harmony and peace. As some like to say: spanked wife, happy life. A wife feels less inner desire to rebel against her husband or to argue with him, living safely within his guiderails. A man can lead his wife more easily with gentle words, not needing to raise his voice. There is no ongoing conflict. There is a clear leader and a clear follower. Any conflicts from the past have been resolved. Both man and wife have embraced their roles, and work together as a well designed machine. This is how marriage is meant to be, and God designed us so that we can accomplish it. 

It usually increases intimacy: There is no surprise that giving and or receiving a spanking can carry an erotic charge. Spanking itself, with its interplay of male strength, and a woman’s softness, with its nudity, with a man’s penetrating commands and one body pounding against another, easily leaves one aroused. Even the thought of it arouses many. For that reason, many couples engage in sex afterward, and others find in helps break down any barriers to intimacy they had previously experienced. It is true that on the woman’s part she does not always experience excitement during the spanking itself, especially if it is very hard, but often she does when thinking about the experience, or after she’s been spanked. Her man’s power is arousing, as is his control over her body. Many couples would testify they grew closer physically after they began with discipline. 

It helps a woman feel more protected: While some find it counterintuitive, since they assume being spanked creates a scary environment, in the long run marital spankings helps a wife feel safe and protected. In experiencing her husband’s strength through the punishment, a wife also experiences the safety and protection afterward. Her husband’s oversight of her in general, his command of her, and his attention let her know just how much he is her man, and just how looked over she is. That sense of protection is what any woman ought to feel from her husband. She is safe through his strength. He is her daily king and her shepherd. She can trust in him.

It helps a man take charge of his home: Many will emphasize the way that spanking helps a woman to submit, but it also just as easily helps a man to lead in the home. Even men who had before not taken up clear reins of leadership now begin to be more responsible and take charge. The need to discipline their wives has made them aware of their overall need to lead. They become more active in setting standards in the home and in instructing their wives. They become more active in verbally correcting her when needed. They put up with less nonsense from her. In general they start showing the oversight they needed to show from the beginning, and learning to give discipline is what started this, or increased it. With discipline, there are no more passive men. 

It allows a man to manage his wife more easily: Apart from ending certain bad habits, giving a wife spankings provides aid long into the future, since it allows a man to handle his wife with ease. His wife learns that the husband’s words carry weight. She learns that there are consequences for disobeying. This means that the husband will find he can lead, guide, and correct her verbally with much more ease. His words reach her more effectively. In the long run, this will mean less need for punishment in the future. It will make for a man who is happier and more at peace himself. He will be more overjoyed with his wife also, at her gentle behavior and the blessings she brings. The thought of marriage, of coming home to his wife, are nothing but pleasant, and he knows that she follows him. 

There is much more to say, of course. These are just key points in how discipline benefits a marriage. I write out of personal experience, and also within the context of other couples I have spoken with about their experience. This is not abstract truth, but very practical. I sincerely believe that if you don’t find at least the large majority of these effects through discipline in marriage, you are doing something wrong. Discipline cleanses the home of many wrongs, and aids in the growth of man and wife. Spanking as discipline proves more effective and convenient than other kinds of discipline. For those who have not brought it into your marriage, consider the help that it will bring you.